my personal qualities essay

Essay Service Examples Life About Myself

My Personal Qualities: Essay

Proper editing and formatting
Free revision, title page, and bibliography
Flexible prices and money-back guarantee

Our writers will provide you with an essay sample written from scratch: any topic, any deadline, any instructions.

Cite this paper

Join our 150k of happy users

Get original paper written according to your instructions
Save time for what matters most

Fair Use Policy

EduBirdie considers academic integrity to be the essential part of the learning process and does not support any violation of the academic standards. Should you have any questions regarding our Fair Use Policy or become aware of any violations, please do not hesitate to contact us via [email protected].

We are here 24/7 to write your paper in as fast as 3 hours.

Provide your email, and we'll send you this sample!

By providing your email, you agree to our Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy .

Say goodbye to copy-pasting!

Get custom-crafted papers for you.

Enter your email, and we'll promptly send you the full essay. No need to copy piece by piece. It's in your inbox!

Personal Characteristics Essay: Top Examples and Tips for Successful Writing

Looking to write a compelling personal characteristics essay? Our article offers top examples and tips for successful writing.

Posted August 18, 2023

Featuring Ty C.

Ask Me Anything: Dental School Applications

Starting tuesday, august 6.

12:30 AM UTC · 30 minutes

When it comes to writing a personal characteristics essay, there are several important factors to consider to ensure that your essay stands out from the rest. This type of essay requires you to talk about your personal traits and characteristics and how they have shaped your life experiences and decisions. Writing a personal characteristics essay can be daunting, but with the right strategies and techniques, you can craft an impressive essay that leaves a lasting impression.

Understanding the Purpose of a Personal Characteristics Essay

Before diving into the writing process, it's essential to understand the purpose of a personal characteristics essay. The purpose of this type of essay is to showcase your unique qualities and characteristics, which makes you stand out from the rest. It's an opportunity for the reader to gain insight into your personality and the way you think. Your essay should not only provide a description of your traits but also demonstrate how they influence your actions and decisions.

Additionally, a personal characteristics essay can also serve as a tool for self-reflection and personal growth. Through the process of writing about your traits and how they have impacted your life, you may gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your values. This type of essay can also help you identify areas for improvement and set goals for personal development.

How to Choose a Topic for Your Personal Characteristics Essay

Choosing the right topic for your personal characteristics essay is crucial. You want to select a topic that not only reflects your personality but also allows you to showcase your writing skills. Start by brainstorming a list of traits and characteristics that define you. From there, select a topic that highlights one or two of these traits. Think about a situation that showcases these traits and how you overcame a challenge or learned a valuable lesson.

Another important factor to consider when choosing a topic for your personal characteristics essay is your audience. Think about who will be reading your essay and what they might be interested in learning about you. Consider selecting a topic that is relatable and relevant to your audience, while still highlighting your unique qualities.

It's also important to remember that your personal characteristics essay should not just be a list of traits or accomplishments. Instead, focus on telling a story that illustrates your personality and how it has shaped your experiences and perspectives. Choose a topic that allows you to delve deeper into your personal journey and share insights that will resonate with your readers.

Brainstorming Techniques for Your Personal Characteristics Essay

Brainstorming is an essential step in the writing process. It allows you to generate ideas and make connections between them. Try using mind maps or free-writing to get your ideas down on paper. You might also consider asking friends or family members what they think your most prominent traits are to get an outside perspective.

Another effective technique for brainstorming your personal characteristics essay is to reflect on your past experiences and how they have shaped you. Think about challenges you have faced and how you overcame them, or moments of success and how they have contributed to your personal growth. These experiences can provide valuable insight into your character and help you identify key traits to highlight in your essay.

The Importance of Organizing Your Thoughts and Ideas

Once you've generated your ideas, it's time to organize them. Start by creating an outline that includes the main points you want to make in your essay. Your outline should also include the introduction, body, and conclusion sections of your essay. Organizing your thoughts and ideas will help you stay on track and ensure that you cover all the necessary points in your essay.

Moreover, organizing your thoughts and ideas can also help you identify any gaps in your argument or areas where you need to do more research. By creating an outline, you can see where you need to add more information or examples to support your points. This can help you create a more well-rounded and convincing essay.

Additionally, organizing your thoughts and ideas can also help you save time in the long run. When you have a clear outline to follow, you can write your essay more efficiently and effectively. You won't waste time trying to figure out what to write next or how to structure your essay. Instead, you can focus on writing high-quality content that supports your thesis statement and engages your readers.

Tips for Writing a Strong Introduction to Your Essay

The introduction to your essay is crucial as it sets the tone for the rest of your essay. Your introduction should grab the reader's attention and entice them to keep reading. Consider starting with a hook, such as a quote, an anecdote, or a question. Your introduction should also include your thesis statement, which outlines the main point of your essay.

In addition to a hook and thesis statement, your introduction should also provide some background information on the topic you are writing about. This can help to contextualize your essay and give the reader a better understanding of the subject matter. However, be careful not to include too much information in your introduction, as it can become overwhelming and detract from the main point of your essay.

The Art of Developing a Compelling Thesis Statement

Your thesis statement should be concise and clear. It should provide a roadmap for the rest of your essay. Think about the main point you want to make and how you plan on supporting it throughout your essay. Make sure your thesis statement is arguable and specific.

Supporting Your Claims with Relevant Examples and Evidence

To make your essay more compelling, you should back up your claims and arguments with relevant examples and evidence. This will help your reader understand the extent of your personal qualities and how they have impacted your life experiences. Make sure to include specific examples from your life that illustrate the qualities you're discussing in your essay.

One effective way to provide evidence for your claims is to use statistics or data that support your argument. For example, if you're writing an essay about the benefits of exercise, you could include statistics about the number of people who have improved their health through regular exercise. This will add credibility to your argument and make it more convincing.

Another way to support your claims is to use expert opinions or quotes from reputable sources. This can help to strengthen your argument and show that you have done your research on the topic. Be sure to properly cite any sources you use in your essay.

The Power of Descriptive Writing: Painting a Vivid Picture with Words

Descriptive writing is a powerful tool that can be used to paint a vivid picture of your experiences and personality in your essay. Use sensory details to help your reader visualize your experiences. Consider incorporating metaphors or similes to make your writing more interesting and engaging.

Adding Depth and Complexity to Your Essay through Analysis and Reflection

Analysis and reflection are essential elements of an outstanding personal characteristics essay. Once you have described your traits and experiences, you should analyze how they have contributed to your personal growth and development. Reflection is also important as it allows you to consider how you might apply your characteristics to future situations.

The Benefits of Peer Review and Collaboration in Essay Writing

Collaborating with others can be immensely helpful in refining your essay. You might consider having a friend or family member review your essay and provide feedback. Peer review can help you identify areas where your essay needs improvement and provide suggestions for how to improve it.

Strategies for Effective Editing and Proofreading

Editing and proofreading are crucial steps in the writing process. Once you have completed your essay, take a break and come back to it with fresh eyes. Look for errors in grammar, punctuation, and spelling. Make sure to also check that your essay flows logically and that your arguments are well-supported.

Addressing Common Pitfalls in Personal Characteristics Essays

One common pitfall in personal characteristics essays is focusing too much on describing your traits instead of analyzing how they have impacted your life experiences. Another common pitfall is using cliches or generic language instead of making your essay unique and interesting. Be sure to avoid these pitfalls to ensure your essay stands out.

Using Keywords and Meta Tags to Optimize Your Essay for Search Engines

If you plan on publishing your essay online, you might consider optimizing it for search engines such as Google. This involves using keywords and meta tags in your essay that will help it appear higher in search results. Be sure to research the most popular keywords related to your topic and include them strategically in your essay.

Crafting an Impressive Conclusion that Leaves a Lasting Impression

Finally, your conclusion should leave a lasting impression on the reader. Summarize your main points and reiterate your thesis statement. Think about what you want your reader to take away from your essay. Consider ending with a call to action or a memorable quote.

Writing a personal characteristics essay can be a challenging task, but with the right strategies and techniques, you can craft an impressive essay that showcases your unique qualities and characteristics. By following the tips outlined above, you'll be well on your way to writing a successful personal characteristics essay that leaves a lasting impression.

Browse hundreds of expert coaches

Leland coaches have helped thousands of people achieve their goals. A dedicated mentor can make all the difference.

Browse Related Articles

May 19, 2023

Crafting an Effective Personal Statement for SOAP: Tips and Guidelines

Crafting an effective personal statement for SOAP can be a daunting task, but with these tips and guidelines, you can create a standout statement that showcases your strengths and experiences.

December 7, 2023

How to Get Volunteer Hours for Dental School Applications

If you're looking to apply to dental school, you'll need to have volunteer hours under your belt.

How to Answer the "Why This Dental School?" Application Question

Learn how to craft a compelling response to the common dental school application question, "Why this dental school?" Our article provides expert tips and strategies to help you stand out and impress admissions committees.

How to Get Off the Dental School Application Waitlist

Discover effective strategies to increase your chances of getting off the dental school application waitlist.

How to Apply to Dental School as a Non-Traditional Applicant: Tips and Strategies for Success

Are you a non-traditional applicant looking to apply to dental school? This article provides valuable tips and strategies for success, including advice on how to stand out in your application, how to prepare for interviews, and more.

January 9, 2024

Marquette Dental School: Application Requirements, Acceptance Rates, and How to Get In (2023-2024)

Considering applying to the Marquette Dental School? Familiarize yourself with the application requirements, gain insights into the acceptance rates, and understand how to increase your chances of securing admission.

February 16, 2024

Dental Hygienist School: Program & Application Overview

Looking to become a dental hygienist? This comprehensive article provides an in-depth overview of dental hygienist schools, programs, and the application process.

February 26, 2024

University of Washington (UW) Dental School: Letters of Recommendation Guide

Learn how to navigate the University of Washington (UW) Dental School's letters of recommendation process with our comprehensive guide.

March 20, 2024

Writing a Strong Medical School Update Letter for Admission

Learn how to craft a powerful medical school update letter that will impress admissions committees and increase your chances of acceptance.

May 10, 2024

How to Write a Powerful Personal Statement for Medical School

The personal statement can make or break your medical school application. Learn how to write it and strategies to make it stand out to admissions committees in this expert guide.

September 14, 2023

How to Prepare for Your Dental School Interviews

Logan R., a seasoned dental school admissions expert, shares invaluable tips and strategies to help you navigate the daunting interview process with confidence.

How to Prepare for the CASPer Test: A Comprehensive Guide for Dental School Applicants

If you're a dental school applicant, preparing for the CASPer test can be overwhelming.

What are your chances of acceptance?

Calculate for all schools, your chance of acceptance.

Your chancing factors

Extracurriculars.

10 Personal Statement Essay Examples That Worked

What’s covered:, what is a personal statement.

Essay 1: Summer Program
Essay 2: Being Bangladeshi-American
Essay 3: Why Medicine
Essay 4: Love of Writing
Essay 5: Starting a Fire
Essay 6: Dedicating a Track
Essay 7: Body Image and Eating Disorders
Essay 8: Becoming a Coach
Essay 9: Eritrea
Essay 10: Journaling
Is Your Personal Statement Strong Enough?

Your personal statement is any essay that you must write for your main application, such as the Common App Essay , University of California Essays , or Coalition Application Essay . This type of essay focuses on your unique experiences, ideas, or beliefs that may not be discussed throughout the rest of your application. This essay should be an opportunity for the admissions officers to get to know you better and give them a glimpse into who you really are.

In this post, we will share 10 different personal statements that were all written by real students. We will also provide commentary on what each essay did well and where there is room for improvement, so you can make your personal statement as strong as possible!

Please note: Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized.

Personal Statement Examples

Essay example #1: exchange program.

The twisting roads, ornate mosaics, and fragrant scent of freshly ground spices had been so foreign at first. Now in my fifth week of the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco, I felt more comfortable in the city. With a bag full of pastries from the market, I navigated to a bus stop, paid the fare, and began the trip back to my host family’s house. It was hard to believe that only a few years earlier my mom was worried about letting me travel around my home city on my own, let alone a place that I had only lived in for a few weeks. While I had been on a journey towards self-sufficiency and independence for a few years now, it was Morocco that pushed me to become the confident, self-reflective person that I am today.

As a child, my parents pressured me to achieve perfect grades, master my swim strokes, and discover interesting hobbies like playing the oboe and learning to pick locks. I felt compelled to live my life according to their wishes. Of course, this pressure was not a wholly negative factor in my life –– you might even call it support. However, the constant presence of my parents’ hopes for me overcame my own sense of desire and led me to become quite dependent on them. I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school. Despite all these achievements, I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success. I had always been expected to succeed on the path they had defined. However, this path was interrupted seven years after my parents’ divorce when my dad moved across the country to Oregon.

I missed my dad’s close presence, but I loved my new sense of freedom. My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go.

I lived with a host family in Marrakesh and learned that they, too, had high expectations for me. I didn’t know a word of Arabic, and although my host parents and one brother spoke good English, they knew I was there to learn. If I messed up, they patiently corrected me but refused to let me fall into the easy pattern of speaking English just as I did at home. Just as I had when I was younger, I felt pressured and stressed about meeting their expectations. However, one day, as I strolled through the bustling market square after successfully bargaining with one of the street vendors, I realized my mistake. My host family wasn’t being unfair by making me fumble through Arabic. I had applied for this trip, and I had committed to the intensive language study. My host family’s rules about speaking Arabic at home had not been to fulfill their expectations for me, but to help me fulfill my expectations for myself. Similarly, the pressure my parents had put on me as a child had come out of love and their hopes for me, not out of a desire to crush my individuality.

As my bus drove through the still-bustling market square and past the medieval Ben-Youssef madrasa, I realized that becoming independent was a process, not an event. I thought that my parents’ separation when I was ten had been the one experience that would transform me into a self-motivated and autonomous person. It did, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t still have room to grow. Now, although I am even more self-sufficient than I was three years ago, I try to approach every experience with the expectation that it will change me. It’s still difficult, but I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important.

What the Essay Did Well

This is a nice essay because it delves into particular character trait of the student and how it has been shaped and matured over time. Although it doesn’t focus the essay around a specific anecdote, the essay is still successful because it is centered around this student’s independence. This is a nice approach for a personal statement: highlight a particular trait of yours and explore how it has grown with you.

The ideas in this essay are universal to growing up—living up to parents’ expectations, yearning for freedom, and coming to terms with reality—but it feels unique to the student because of the inclusion of details specific to them. Including their oboe lessons, the experience of riding the light rail by themselves, and the negotiations with a street vendor helps show the reader what these common tropes of growing up looked like for them personally.

Another strength of the essay is the level of self-reflection included throughout the piece. Since there is no central anecdote tying everything together, an essay about a character trait is only successful when you deeply reflect on how you felt, where you made mistakes, and how that trait impacts your life. The author includes reflection in sentences like “ I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success, ” and “ I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important. ” These sentences help us see how the student was impacted and what their point of view is.

What Could Be Improved

The largest change this essay would benefit from is to show not tell. The platitude you have heard a million times no doubt, but for good reason. This essay heavily relies on telling the reader what occurred, making us less engaged as the entire reading experience feels more passive. If the student had shown us what happens though, it keeps the reader tied to the action and makes them feel like they are there with the student, making it much more enjoyable to read.

For example, they tell us about the pressure to succeed their parents placed on them: “ I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school.” They could have shown us what that pressure looked like with a sentence like this: “ My stomach turned somersaults as my rattling knee thumped against the desk before every test, scared to get anything less than a 95. For five years the painful squawk of the oboe only reminded me of my parents’ claps and whistles at my concerts. I mastered the butterfly, backstroke, and freestyle, fighting against the anchor of their expectations threatening to pull me down.”

If the student had gone through their essay and applied this exercise of bringing more detail and colorful language to sentences that tell the reader what happened, the essay would be really great.

Table of Contents

Essay Example #2: Being Bangladeshi-American

Life before was good: verdant forests, sumptuous curries, and a devoted family.

Then, my family abandoned our comfortable life in Bangladesh for a chance at the American dream in Los Angeles. Within our first year, my father was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. He lost his battle three weeks before my sixth birthday. Facing a new country without the steady presence of my father, we were vulnerable — prisoners of hardship in the land of the free. We resettled in the Bronx, in my uncle’s renovated basement. It was meant to be our refuge, but I felt more displaced than ever. Gone were the high-rise condos of West L.A.; instead, government projects towered over the neighborhood. Pedestrians no longer smiled and greeted me; the atmosphere was hostile, even toxic. Schoolkids were quick to pick on those they saw as weak or foreign, hurling harsh words I’d never heard before.

Meanwhile, my family began integrating into the local Bangladeshi community. I struggled to understand those who shared my heritage. Bangladeshi mothers stayed home while fathers drove cabs and sold fruit by the roadside — painful societal positions. Riding on crosstown buses or walking home from school, I began to internalize these disparities. During my fleeting encounters with affluent Upper East Siders, I saw kids my age with nannies, parents who wore suits to work, and luxurious apartments with spectacular views. Most took cabs to their destinations: cabs that Bangladeshis drove. I watched the mundane moments of their lives with longing, aching to plant myself in their shoes. Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day.

As I grappled with my relationship with the Bangladeshi community, I turned my attention to helping my Bronx community by pursuing an internship with Assemblyman Luis Sepulveda. I handled desk work and took calls, spending the bulk of my time actively listening to the hardships constituents faced — everything from a veteran stripped of his benefits to a grandmother unable to support her bedridden grandchild.

I’d never exposed myself to stories like these, and now I was the first to hear them. As an intern, I could only assist in what felt like the small ways — pointing out local job offerings, printing information on free ESL classes, reaching out to non-profits. But to a community facing an onslaught of intense struggles, I realized that something as small as these actions could have vast impacts. Seeing the immediate consequences of my actions inspired me. Throughout that summer, I internalized my community’s daily challenges in a new light. I began to stop seeing the prevalent underemployment and cramped living quarters less as sources of shame. Instead, I saw them as realities that had to be acknowledged, but could ultimately be remedied. I also realized the benefits of the Bangladeshi culture I had been so ashamed of. My Bangla language skills were an asset to the office, and my understanding of Bangladeshi etiquette allowed for smooth communication between office staff and its constituents. As I helped my neighbors navigate city services, I saw my heritage with pride — a perspective I never expected to have.

I can now appreciate the value of my unique culture and background, and of living with less. This perspective offers room for progress, community integration, and a future worth fighting for. My time with Assemblyman Sepulveda’s office taught me that I can be a change agent in enabling this progression. Far from being ashamed of my community, I want to someday return to local politics in the Bronx to continue helping others access the American Dream. I hope to help my community appreciate the opportunity to make progress together. By embracing reality, I learned to live it. Along the way, I discovered one thing: life is good, but we can make it better.

This student’s passion for social justice and civic duty shines through in this essay because of how honest it is. Sharing their personal experience with immigrating, moving around, being an outsider, and finding a community allows us to see the hardships this student has faced and builds empathy towards their situation. However, what really makes it strong is that they go beyond describing the difficulties they faced and explain the mental impact it had on them as a child: Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day.

The rejection of their culture presented at the beginning of the essay creates a nice juxtaposition with the student’s view in the latter half of the essay and helps demonstrate how they have matured. They use their experience interning as a way to delve into a change in their thought process about their culture and show how their passion for social justice began. Using this experience as a mechanism to explore their thoughts and feelings is an excellent example of how items that are included elsewhere on your application should be incorporated into your essay.

This essay prioritizes emotions and personal views over specific anecdotes. Although there are details and certain moments incorporated throughout to emphasize the author’s points, the main focus remains on the student and how they grapple with their culture and identity.

One area for improvement is the conclusion. Although the forward-looking approach is a nice way to end an essay focused on social justice, it would be nice to include more details and imagery in the conclusion. How does the student want to help their community? What government position do they see themselves holding one day?

A more impactful ending might look like the student walking into their office at the New York City Housing Authority in 15 years and looking at the plans to build a new development in the Bronx just blocks away from where the grew up that would provide quality housing to people in their Bangladeshi community. They would smile while thinking about how far they have come from that young kid who used to be ashamed of their culture.

Essay Example #3: Why Medicine

I took my first trip to China to visit my cousin Anna in July of 2014. Distance had kept us apart, but when we were together, we fell into all of our old inside jokes and caught up on each other’s lives. Her sparkling personality and optimistic attitude always brought a smile to my face. This time, however, my heart broke when I saw the effects of her brain cancer; she had suffered from a stroke that paralyzed her left side. She was still herself in many ways, but I could see that the damage to her brain made things difficult for her. I stayed by her every day, providing the support she needed, whether assisting her with eating and drinking, reading to her, or just watching “Friends.” During my flight back home, sorrow and helplessness overwhelmed me. Would I ever see Anna again? Could I have done more to make Anna comfortable? I wished I could stay in China longer to care for her. As I deplaned, I wondered if I could transform my grief to help other children and teenagers in the US who suffered as Anna did.

The day after I got home, as jet lag dragged me awake a few minutes after midnight, I remembered hearing about the Family Reach Foundation (FRF) and its work with children going through treatments at the local hospital and their families. I began volunteering in the FRF’s Children’s Activity Room, where I play with children battling cancer. Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up. When they take on the roles of firefighters or fairies, we all get caught up in the game; for that time, they forget the sanitized, stark, impersonal walls of the pediatric oncology ward. Building close relationships with them and seeing them giggle and laugh is so rewarding — I love watching them grow and get better throughout their course of treatment.

Hearing from the parents about their children’s condition and seeing the children recover inspired me to consider medical research. To get started, I enrolled in a summer collegelevel course in Abnormal Psychology. There I worked with Catelyn, a rising college senior, on a data analysis project regarding Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). Together, we examined the neurological etiology of DID by studying four fMRI and PET cases. I fell in love with gathering data and analyzing the results and was amazed by our final product: several stunning brain images showcasing the areas of hyper and hypoactivity in brains affected by DID. Desire quickly followed my amazement — I want to continue this project and study more brains. Their complexity, delicacy, and importance to every aspect of life fascinate me. Successfully completing this research project gave me a sense of hope; I know I am capable of participating in a large scale research project and potentially making a difference in someone else’s life through my research.

Anna’s diagnosis inspired me to begin volunteering at FRF; from there, I discovered my desire to help people further by contributing to medical research. As my research interest blossomed, I realized that it’s no coincidence that I want to study brains—after all, Anna suffered from brain cancer. Reflecting on these experiences this past year and a half, I see that everything I’ve done is connected. Sadly, a few months after I returned from China, Anna passed away. I am still sad, but as I run a toy truck across the floor and watch one of the little patients’ eyes light up, I imagine that she would be proud of my commitment to pursue medicine and study the brain.

This essay has a very strong emotional core that tugs at the heart strings and makes the reader feel invested. Writing about sickness can be difficult and doesn’t always belong in a personal statement, but in this case it works well because the focus is on how this student cared for her cousin and dealt with the grief and emotions surrounding her condition. Writing about the compassion she showed and the doubts and concerns that filled her mind keeps the focus on the author and her personality.

This continues when she again discusses the activities she did with the kids at FRF and the personal reflection this experience allowed her to have. For example, she writes: Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up.

Concluding the essay with the sad story of her cousin’s passing brings the essay full circle and returns to the emotional heart of the piece to once again build a connection with the reader. However, it finishes on a hopeful note and demonstrates how this student has been able to turn a tragic experience into a source of lifelong inspiration.

One thing this essay should be cognizant of is that personal statements should not read as summaries of your extracurricular resume. Although this essay doesn’t fully fall into that trap, it does describe two key extracurriculars the student participated in. However, the inclusion of such a strong emotional core running throughout the essay helps keep the focus on the student and her thoughts and feelings during these activities.

To avoid making this mistake, make sure you have a common thread running through your essay and the extracurriculars provide support to the story you are trying to tell, rather than crafting a story around your activities. And, as this essay does, make sure there is lots of personal reflection and feelings weaved throughout to focus attention to you rather than your extracurriculars.

Essay Example #4: Love of Writing

“I want to be a writer.” This had been my answer to every youthful discussion with the adults in my life about what I would do when I grew up. As early as elementary school, I remember reading my writing pieces aloud to an audience at “Author of the Month” ceremonies. Bearing this goal in mind, and hoping to gain some valuable experience, I signed up for a journalism class during my freshman year. Despite my love for writing, I initially found myself uninterested in the subject and I struggled to enjoy the class. When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines. Journalism required a laconic style and orderly structure, and I found my teacher’s assignments formulaic and dull. That class shook my confidence as a writer. I was uncertain if I should continue in it for the rest of my high school career.

Despite my misgivings, I decided that I couldn’t make a final decision on whether to quit journalism until I had some experience working for a paper outside of the classroom. The following year, I applied to be a staff reporter on our school newspaper. I hoped this would help me become more self-driven and creative, rather than merely writing articles that my teacher assigned. To my surprise, my time on staff was worlds away from what I experienced in the journalism class. Although I was unaccustomed to working in a fast-paced environment and initially found it burdensome to research and complete high-quality stories in a relatively short amount of time, I also found it exciting. I enjoyed learning more about topics and events on campus that I did not know much about; some of my stories that I covered in my first semester concerned a chess tournament, a food drive, and a Spanish immersion party. I relished in the freedom I had to explore and learn, and to write more independently than I could in a classroom.

Although I enjoyed many aspects of working for the paper immediately, reporting also pushed me outside of my comfort zone. I am a shy person, and speaking with people I did not know intimidated me. During my first interview, I met with the basketball coach to prepare for a story about the team’s winning streak. As I approached his office, I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block, and I could hardly get out my opening questions. Fortunately, the coach was very kind and helped me through the conversation. Encouraged, I prepared for my next interview with more confidence. After a few weeks of practice, I even started to look forward to interviewing people on campus. That first journalism class may have bored me, but even if journalism in practice was challenging, it was anything but tedious.

Over the course of that year, I grew to love writing for our school newspaper. Reporting made me aware of my surroundings, and made me want to know more about current events on campus and in the town where I grew up. By interacting with people all over campus, I came to understand the breadth of individuals and communities that make up my high school. I felt far more connected to diverse parts of my school through my work as a journalist, and I realized that journalism gave me a window into seeing beyond my own experiences. The style of news writing may be different from what I used to think “writing” meant, but I learned that I can still derive exciting plots from events that may have gone unnoticed if not for my stories. I no longer struggle to approach others, and truly enjoy getting to know people and recognizing their accomplishments through my writing. Becoming a writer may be a difficult path, but it is as rewarding as I hoped when I was young.

This essay is clearly structured in a manner that makes it flow very nicely and contributes to its success. It starts with a quote to draw in the reader and show this student’s life-long passion for writing. Then it addresses the challenges of facing new, unfamiliar territory and how this student overcame it. Finally, it concludes by reflecting on this eye-opening experience and a nod to their younger self from the introduction. Having a well-thought out and sequential structure with clear transitions makes it extremely easy for the reader to follow along and take away the main idea.

Another positive aspect of the essay is the use of strong and expressive language. Sentences like “ When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines ” stand out because of the intentional use of words like “lyrical”, “profound”, and “thrilling” to convey the student’s love of writing. The author also uses an active voice to capture the readers’ attention and keep us engaged. They rely on their language and diction to reveal details to the reader, for instance saying “ I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block ” to describe feeling nervous.

This essay is already very strong, so there isn’t much that needs to be changed. One thing that could take the essay from great to outstanding would be to throw in more quotes, internal dialogue, and sensory descriptors.

It would be nice to see the nerves they felt interviewing the coach by including dialogue like “ Um…I want to interview you about…uh…”. They could have shown their original distaste for journalism by narrating the thoughts running through their head. The fast-paced environment of their newspaper could have come to life with descriptions about the clacking of keyboards and the whirl of people running around laying out articles.

Essay Example #5: Starting a Fire

Was I no longer the beloved daughter of nature, whisperer of trees? Knee-high rubber boots, camouflage, bug spray—I wore the garb and perfume of a proud wild woman, yet there I was, hunched over the pathetic pile of stubborn sticks, utterly stumped, on the verge of tears. As a child, I had considered myself a kind of rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees, who could glide through tick-infested meadows and emerge Lyme-free. I knew the cracks of the earth like the scars on my own rough palms. Yet here I was, ten years later, incapable of performing the most fundamental outdoor task: I could not, for the life of me, start a fire.

Furiously I rubbed the twigs together—rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers. No smoke. The twigs were too young, too sticky-green; I tossed them away with a shower of curses, and began tearing through the underbrush in search of a more flammable collection. My efforts were fruitless. Livid, I bit a rejected twig, determined to prove that the forest had spurned me, offering only young, wet bones that would never burn. But the wood cracked like carrots between my teeth—old, brittle, and bitter. Roaring and nursing my aching palms, I retreated to the tent, where I sulked and awaited the jeers of my family.

Rattling their empty worm cans and reeking of fat fish, my brother and cousins swaggered into the campsite. Immediately, they noticed the minor stick massacre by the fire pit and called to me, their deep voices already sharp with contempt.

“Where’s the fire, Princess Clara?” they taunted. “Having some trouble?” They prodded me with the ends of the chewed branches and, with a few effortless scrapes of wood on rock, sparked a red and roaring flame. My face burned long after I left the fire pit. The camp stank of salmon and shame.

In the tent, I pondered my failure. Was I so dainty? Was I that incapable? I thought of my hands, how calloused and capable they had been, how tender and smooth they had become. It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive. And I’d gotten glasses, having grown horrifically nearsighted; long nights of dim lighting and thick books had done this. I couldn’t remember the last time I had lain down on a hill, barefaced, and seen the stars without having to squint. Crawling along the edge of the tent, a spider confirmed my transformation—he disgusted me, and I felt an overwhelming urge to squash him.

Yet, I realized I hadn’t really changed—I had only shifted perspective. I still eagerly explored new worlds, but through poems and prose rather than pastures and puddles. I’d grown to prefer the boom of a bass over that of a bullfrog, learned to coax a different kind of fire from wood, having developed a burn for writing rhymes and scrawling hypotheses.

That night, I stayed up late with my journal and wrote about the spider I had decided not to kill. I had tolerated him just barely, only shrieking when he jumped—it helped to watch him decorate the corners of the tent with his delicate webs, knowing that he couldn’t start fires, either. When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.

This student is an excellent writer, which allows a simple story to be outstandingly compelling. The author articulates her points beautifully and creatively through her immense use of details and figurative language. Lines like “a rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees,” and “rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers,” create vivid images that draw the reader in.

The flowery and descriptive prose also contributes to the nice juxtaposition between the old Clara and the new Clara. The latter half of the essay contrasts elements of nature with music and writing to demonstrate how natural these interests are for her now. This sentence perfectly encapsulates the contrast she is trying to build: “It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive.”

In addition to being well-written, this essay is thematically cohesive. It begins with the simple introduction “Fire!” and ends with the following image: “When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.” This full-circle approach leaves readers satisfied and impressed.

There is very little this essay should change, however one thing to be cautious about is having an essay that is overly-descriptive. We know from the essay that this student likes to read and write, and depending on other elements of her application, it might make total sense to have such a flowery and ornate writing style. However, your personal statement needs to reflect your voice as well as your personality. If you would never use language like this in conversation or your writing, don’t put it in your personal statement. Make sure there is a balance between eloquence and your personal voice.

Essay Example #6: Dedicating a Track

“Getting beat is one thing – it’s part of competing – but I want no part in losing.” Coach Rob Stark’s motto never fails to remind me of his encouragement on early-morning bus rides to track meets around the state. I’ve always appreciated the phrase, but an experience last June helped me understand its more profound, universal meaning.

Stark, as we affectionately call him, has coached track at my high school for 25 years. His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running. When I learned a neighboring high school had dedicated their track to a longtime coach, I felt that Stark deserved similar honors.

Our school district’s board of education indicated they would only dedicate our track to Stark if I could demonstrate that he was extraordinary. I took charge and mobilized my teammates to distribute petitions, reach out to alumni, and compile statistics on the many team and individual champions Stark had coached over the years. We received astounding support, collecting almost 3,000 signatures and pages of endorsements from across the community. With help from my teammates, I presented this evidence to the board.

They didn’t bite.

Most members argued that dedicating the track was a low priority. Knowing that we had to act quickly to convince them of its importance, I called a team meeting where we drafted a rebuttal for the next board meeting. To my surprise, they chose me to deliver it. I was far from the best public speaker in the group, and I felt nervous about going before the unsympathetic board again. However, at that second meeting, I discovered that I enjoy articulating and arguing for something that I’m passionate about.

Public speaking resembles a cross country race. Walking to the starting line, you have to trust your training and quell your last minute doubts. When the gun fires, you can’t think too hard about anything; your performance has to be instinctual, natural, even relaxed. At the next board meeting, the podium was my starting line. As I walked up to it, familiar butterflies fluttered in my stomach. Instead of the track stretching out in front of me, I faced the vast audience of teachers, board members, and my teammates. I felt my adrenaline build, and reassured myself: I’ve put in the work, my argument is powerful and sound. As the board president told me to introduce myself, I heard, “runners set” in the back of my mind. She finished speaking, and Bang! The brief silence was the gunshot for me to begin.

The next few minutes blurred together, but when the dust settled, I knew from the board members’ expressions and the audience’s thunderous approval that I had run quite a race. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough; the board voted down our proposal. I was disappointed, but proud of myself, my team, and our collaboration off the track. We stood up for a cause we believed in, and I overcame my worries about being a leader. Although I discovered that changing the status quo through an elected body can be a painstakingly difficult process and requires perseverance, I learned that I enjoy the challenges this effort offers. Last month, one of the school board members joked that I had become a “regular” – I now often show up to meetings to advocate for a variety of causes, including better environmental practices in cafeterias and safer equipment for athletes.

Just as Stark taught me, I worked passionately to achieve my goal. I may have been beaten when I appealed to the board, but I certainly didn’t lose, and that would have made Stark proud.

This essay effectively conveys this student’s compassion for others, initiative, and determination—all great qualities to exemplify in a personal statement!

Although they rely on telling us a lot of what happened up until the board meeting, the use of running a race (their passion) as a metaphor for public speaking provides a lot of insight into the fear that this student overcame to work towards something bigger than themself. Comparing a podium to the starting line, the audience to the track, and silence to the gunshot is a nice way of demonstrating this student’s passion for cross country running without making that the focus of the story.

The essay does a nice job of coming full circle at the end by explaining what the quote from the beginning meant to them after this experience. Without explicitly saying “ I now know that what Stark actually meant is…” they rely on the strength of their argument above to make it obvious to the reader what it means to get beat but not lose.

One of the biggest areas of improvement in the intro, however, is how the essay tells us Stark’s impact rather than showing us: His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

The writer could’ve helped us feel a stronger emotional connection to Stark if they had included examples of Stark’s qualities, rather than explicitly stating them. For example, they could’ve written something like: Stark was the kind of person who would give you gas money if you told him your parents couldn’t afford to pick you up from practice. And he actually did that—several times. At track meets, alumni regularly would come talk to him and tell him how he’d changed their lives. Before Stark, I was ambivalent about running and was on the JV team, but his encouragement motivated me to run longer and harder and eventually make varsity. Because of him, I approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

Essay Example #7: Body Image and Eating Disorders

I press the “discover” button on my Instagram app, hoping to find enticing pictures to satisfy my boredom. Scrolling through, I see funny videos and mouth-watering pictures of food. However, one image stops me immediately. A fit teenage girl with a “perfect body” relaxes in a bikini on a beach. Beneath it, I see a slew of flattering comments. I shake with disapproval over the image’s unrealistic quality. However, part of me still wants to have a body like hers so that others will make similar comments to me.

I would like to resolve a silent issue that harms many teenagers and adults: negative self image and low self-esteem in a world where social media shapes how people view each other. When people see the façades others wear to create an “ideal” image, they can develop poor thought patterns rooted in negative self-talk. The constant comparisons to “perfect” others make people feel small. In this new digital age, it is hard to distinguish authentic from artificial representations.

When I was 11, I developed anorexia nervosa. Though I was already thin, I wanted to be skinny like the models that I saw on the magazine covers on the grocery store stands. Little did I know that those models probably also suffered from disorders, and that photoshop erased their flaws. I preferred being underweight to being healthy. No matter how little I ate or how thin I was, I always thought that I was too fat. I became obsessed with the number on the scale and would try to eat the least that I could without my parents urging me to take more. Fortunately, I stopped engaging in anorexic behaviors before middle school. However, my underlying mental habits did not change. The images that had provoked my disorder in the first place were still a constant presence in my life.

By age 15, I was in recovery from anorexia, but suffered from depression. While I used to only compare myself to models, the growth of social media meant I also compared myself to my friends and acquaintances. I felt left out when I saw my friends’ excitement about lake trips they had taken without me. As I scrolled past endless photos of my flawless, thin classmates with hundreds of likes and affirming comments, I felt my jealousy spiral. I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.” When that didn’t work, I started to feel too anxious to post anything at all.

Body image insecurities and social media comparisons affect thousands of people – men, women, children, and adults – every day. I am lucky – after a few months of my destructive social media habits, I came across a video that pointed out the illusory nature of social media; many Instagram posts only show off good things while people hide their flaws. I began going to therapy, and recovered from my depression. To address the problem of self-image and social media, we can all focus on what matters on the inside and not what is on the surface. As an effort to become healthy internally, I started a club at my school to promote clean eating and radiating beauty from within. It has helped me grow in my confidence, and today I’m not afraid to show others my struggles by sharing my experience with eating disorders. Someday, I hope to make this club a national organization to help teenagers and adults across the country. I support the idea of body positivity and embracing difference, not “perfection.” After all, how can we be ourselves if we all look the same?

This essay covers the difficult topics of eating disorders and mental health. If you’re thinking about covering similar topics in your essay, we recommend reading our post Should You Talk About Mental Health in College Essays?

The short answer is that, yes, you can talk about mental health, but it can be risky. If you do go that route, it’s important to focus on what you learned from the experience.

The strength of this essay is the student’s vulnerability, in excerpts such as this: I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.”

The student goes on to share how they recovered from their depression through an eye-opening video and therapy sessions, and they’re now helping others find their self-worth as well. It’s great that this essay looks towards the future and shares the writer’s goals of making their club a national organization; we can see their ambition and compassion.

The main weakness of this essay is that it doesn’t focus enough on their recovery process, which is arguably the most important part. They could’ve told us more about the video they watched or the process of starting their club and the interactions they’ve had with other members. Especially when sharing such a vulnerable topic, there should be vulnerability in the recovery process too. That way, the reader can fully appreciate all that this student has overcome.

Essay Example #8: Becoming a Coach

”Advanced females ages 13 to 14 please proceed to staging with your coaches at this time.” Skittering around the room, eyes wide and pleading, I frantically explained my situation to nearby coaches. The seconds ticked away in my head; every polite refusal increased my desperation.

Despair weighed me down. I sank to my knees as a stream of competitors, coaches, and officials flowed around me. My dojang had no coach, and the tournament rules prohibited me from competing without one.

Although I wanted to remain strong, doubts began to cloud my mind. I could not help wondering: what was the point of perfecting my skills if I would never even compete? The other members of my team, who had found coaches minutes earlier, attempted to comfort me, but I barely heard their words. They couldn’t understand my despair at being left on the outside, and I never wanted them to understand.

Since my first lesson 12 years ago, the members of my dojang have become family. I have watched them grow up, finding my own happiness in theirs. Together, we have honed our kicks, blocks, and strikes. We have pushed one another to aim higher and become better martial artists. Although my dojang had searched for a reliable coach for years, we had not found one. When we attended competitions in the past, my teammates and I had always gotten lucky and found a sympathetic coach. Now, I knew this practice was unsustainable. It would devastate me to see the other members of my dojang in my situation, unable to compete and losing hope as a result. My dojang needed a coach, and I decided it was up to me to find one.

I first approached the adults in the dojang – both instructors and members’ parents. However, these attempts only reacquainted me with polite refusals. Everyone I asked told me they couldn’t devote multiple weekends per year to competitions. I soon realized that I would have become the coach myself.

At first, the inner workings of tournaments were a mystery to me. To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side. I learned everything from motivational strategies to technical, behind-the-scenes components of Taekwondo competitions. Though I emerged with new knowledge and confidence in my capabilities, others did not share this faith.

Parents threw me disbelieving looks when they learned that their children’s coach was only a child herself. My self-confidence was my armor, deflecting their surly glances. Every armor is penetrable, however, and as the relentless barrage of doubts pounded my resilience, it began to wear down. I grew unsure of my own abilities.

Despite the attack, I refused to give up. When I saw the shining eyes of the youngest students preparing for their first competition, I knew I couldn’t let them down. To quit would be to set them up to be barred from competing like I was. The knowledge that I could solve my dojang’s longtime problem motivated me to overcome my apprehension.

Now that my dojang flourishes at competitions, the attacks on me have weakened, but not ended. I may never win the approval of every parent; at times, I am still tormented by doubts, but I find solace in the fact that members of my dojang now only worry about competing to the best of their abilities.

Now, as I arrive at a tournament with my students, I close my eyes and remember the past. I visualize the frantic search for a coach and the chaos amongst my teammates as we competed with one another to find coaches before the staging calls for our respective divisions. I open my eyes to the exact opposite scene. Lacking a coach hurt my ability to compete, but I am proud to know that no member of my dojang will have to face that problem again.

This essay begins with an in-the-moment narrative that really illustrates the chaos of looking for a coach last-minute. We feel the writer’s emotions, particularly her dejectedness, at not being able to compete. Starting an essay in media res is a great way to capture the attention of your readers and build anticipation for what comes next.

Through this essay, we can see how gutsy and determined the student is in deciding to become a coach themselves. She shows us these characteristics through their actions, rather than explicitly telling us: To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side. Also, by discussing the opposition she faced and how it affected her, the student is open and vulnerable about the reality of the situation.

The essay comes full circle as the author recalls the frantic situations in seeking out a coach, but this is no longer a concern for them and their team. Overall, this essay is extremely effective in painting this student as mature, bold, and compassionate.

The biggest thing this essay needs to work on is showing not telling. Throughout the essay, the student tells us that she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence,” she “grew unsure of her own abilities,” and she “refused to give up”. What we really want to know is what this looks like.

Instead of saying she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence” she should have shared how she taught a new move to a fellow team-member without hesitation. Rather than telling us she “grew unsure of her own abilities” she should have shown what that looked like by including her internal dialogue and rhetorical questions that ran through her mind. She could have demonstrated what “refusing to give up” looks like by explaining how she kept learning coaching techniques on her own, turned to a mentor for advice, or devised a plan to win over the trust of parents.

Essay Example #9: Eritrea

No one knows where Eritrea is.

On the first day of school, for the past nine years, I would pensively stand in front of a class, a teacher, a stranger waiting for the inevitable question: Where are you from?

I smile politely, my dimples accentuating my ambiguous features. “Eritrea,” I answer promptly and proudly. But I am always prepared. Before their expression can deepen into confusion, ready to ask “where is that,” I elaborate, perhaps with a fleeting hint of exasperation, “East Africa, near Ethiopia.”

Sometimes, I single out the key-shaped hermit nation on a map, stunning teachers who have “never had a student from there!” Grinning, I resist the urge to remark, “You didn’t even know it existed until two minutes ago!”

Eritrea is to the East of Ethiopia, its arid coastline clutches the lucrative Red Sea. Battle scars litter the ancient streets – the colonial Italian architecture lathered with bullet holes, the mosques mangled with mortar shells. Originally part of the world’s first Christian kingdom, Eritrea passed through the hands of colonial Italy, Britain, and Ethiopia for over a century, until a bloody thirty year war of Independence liberated us.

But these are facts that anyone can know with a quick Google search. These are facts that I have memorised and compounded, first from my Grandmother and now from pristine books borrowed from the library.

No historical narrative, however, can adequately capture what Eritrea is. No one knows the aroma of bushels of potatoes, tomatoes, and garlic – still covered in dirt – that leads you to the open-air market. No one knows the poignant scent of spices, arranged in orange piles reminiscent of compacted dunes. No one knows how to haggle stubborn herders for sheep and roosters for Christmas celebrations as deliberately as my mother. No one can replicate the perfect balance of spices in dorho and tsebhi as well as my grandmother, her gnarly hands stirring the pot with ancient precision (chastising my clumsy knife work with the potatoes). It’s impossible to learn when the injera is ready – the exact moment you have to lift the lid of the mogogo. Do it too early (or too late) and the flatbread becomes mangled and gross. It is a sixth sense passed through matriarchal lineages.

There are no sources that catalogue the scent of incense that wafts through the sunlit porch on St. Michael’s; no films that can capture the luminescence of hundreds of flaming bonfires that fluoresce the sidewalks on Kudus Yohannes, as excited children chant Ge’ez proverbs whose origin has been lost to time. You cannot learn the familiarity of walking beneath the towering Gothic figure of the Enda Mariam Cathedral, the crowds undulating to the ringing of the archaic bells. I have memorized the sound of the rains hounding the metal roof during kiremti , the heat of the sun pounding against the Toyota’s window as we sped down towards Ghinda , the opulent brilliance of the stars twinkling in a sky untainted by light pollution, the scent of warm rolls of bani wafting through the streets at precisely 6 o’clock each day…

I fill my flimsy sketchbook with pictures from my memory. My hand remembers the shapes of the hibiscus drifting in the wind, the outline of my grandmother (affectionately nicknamed a’abaye ) leaning over the garden, the bizarre architecture of the Fiat Tagliero . I dice the vegetables with movements handed down from generations. My nose remembers the scent of frying garlic, the sourness of the warm tayta , the sharpness of the mit’mt’a …

This knowledge is intrinsic. “I am Eritrean,” I repeat. “I am proud.” Within me is an encyclopedia of history, culture, and idealism.

Eritrea is the coffee made from scratch, the spices drying in the sun, the priests and nuns. Eritrea is wise, filled with ambition, and unseen potential. Eritrea isn’t a place, it’s an identity.

This is an exceptional essay that provides a window into this student’s culture that really makes their love for their country and heritage leap off the page. The sheer level of details and sensory descriptors this student is able to fit in this space makes the essay stand out. From the smells, to the traditions, sounds, and sights, the author encapsulates all the glory of Eritrea for the reader.

The vivid images this student is able to create for the reader, whether it is having the tedious conversation with every teacher or cooking in their grandmother’s kitchen, transports us into the story and makes us feel like we are there in the moment with the student. This is a prime example of an essay that shows , not tells.

Besides the amazing imagery, the use of shorter paragraphs also contributes to how engaging this essay is. Employing this tactic helps break up the text to make it more readable and it isolates ideas so they stick out more than if they were enveloped in a large paragraph.

Overall, this is a really strong essay that brings to life this student’s heritage through its use of vivid imagery. This essay exemplifies what it means to show not tell in your writing, and it is a great example of how you can write an intimate personal statement without making yourself the primary focus of your essay.

There is very little this essay should improve upon, but one thing the student might consider would be to inject more personal reflection into their response. Although we can clearly take away their deep love and passion for their homeland and culture, the essay would be a bit more personal if they included the emotions and feelings they associate with the various aspects of Eritrea. For example, the way their heart swells with pride when their grandmother praises their ability to cook a flatbread or the feeling of serenity when they hear the bells ring out from the cathedral. Including personal details as well as sensory ones would create a wonderful balance of imagery and reflection.

Essay Example #10: Journaling

Flipping past dozens of colorful entries in my journal, I arrive at the final blank sheet. I press my pen lightly to the page, barely scratching its surface to create a series of loops stringing together into sentences. Emotions spill out, and with their release, I feel lightness in my chest. The stream of thoughts slows as I reach the bottom of the page, and I gently close the cover of the worn book: another journal finished.

I add the journal to the stack of eleven books on my nightstand. Struck by the bittersweet sensation of closing a chapter of my life, I grab the notebook at the bottom of the pile to reminisce.

“I want to make a flying mushen to fly in space and your in it” – October 2008

Pulling back the cover of my first Tinkerbell-themed diary, the prompt “My Hopes and Dreams” captures my attention. Though “machine” is misspelled in my scribbled response, I see the beginnings of my past obsession with outer space. At the age of five, I tore through novels about the solar system, experimented with rockets built from plastic straws, and rented Space Shuttle films from Blockbuster to satisfy my curiosities. While I chased down answers to questions as limitless as the universe, I fell in love with learning. Eight journals later, the same relentless curiosity brought me to an airplane descending on San Francisco Bay.

“I wish I had infinite sunsets” – July 2019

I reach for the charcoal notepad near the top of the pile and open to the first page: my flight to the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes. While I was excited to explore bioengineering, anxiety twisted in my stomach as I imagined my destination, unsure of whether I could overcome my shyness and connect with others.

With each new conversation, the sweat on my palms became less noticeable, and I met students from 23 different countries. Many of the moments where I challenged myself socially revolved around the third story deck of the Jerry house. A strange medley of English, Arabic, and Mandarin filled the summer air as my friends and I gathered there every evening, and dialogues at sunset soon became moments of bliss. In our conversations about cultural differences, the possibility of an afterlife, and the plausibility of far-fetched conspiracy theories, I learned to voice my opinion. As I was introduced to different viewpoints, these moments challenged my understanding of the world around me. In my final entries from California, I find excitement to learn from others and increased confidence, a tool that would later allow me to impact my community.

“The beauty in a tower of cans” – June 2020

Returning my gaze to the stack of journals, I stretch to take the floral-patterned book sitting on top. I flip through, eventually finding the beginnings of the organization I created during the outbreak of COVID-19. Since then, Door-to-Door Deliveries has woven its way through my entries and into reality, allowing me to aid high-risk populations through free grocery delivery.

With the confidence I gained the summer before, I took action when seeing others in need rather than letting my shyness hold me back. I reached out to local churches and senior centers to spread word of our services and interacted with customers through our website and social media pages. To further expand our impact, we held two food drives, and I mustered the courage to ask for donations door-to-door. In a tower of canned donations, I saw the value of reaching out to help others and realized my own potential to impact the world around me.

I delicately close the journal in my hands, smiling softly as the memories reappear, one after another. Reaching under my bed, I pull out a fresh notebook and open to its first sheet. I lightly press my pen to the page, “And so begins the next chapter…”

The structuring of this essay makes it easy and enjoyable to read. The student effectively organizes their various life experiences around their tower of journals, which centers the reader and makes the different stories easy to follow. Additionally, the student engages quotes from their journals—and unique formatting of the quotes—to signal that they are moving in time and show us which memory we should follow them to.

Thematically, the student uses the idea of shyness to connect the different memories they draw out of their journals. As the student describes their experiences overcoming shyness at the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes and Door-to-Door Deliveries, this essay can be read as an Overcoming Obstacles essay.

At the end of this essay, readers are fully convinced that this student is dedicated (they have committed to journaling every day), thoughtful (journaling is a thoughtful process and, in the essay, the student reflects thoughtfully on the past), and motivated (they flew across the country for a summer program and started a business). These are definitely qualities admissions officers are looking for in applicants!

Although this essay is already exceptionally strong as it’s written, the first journal entry feels out of place compared to the other two entries that discuss the author’s shyness and determination. It works well for the essay to have an entry from when the student was younger to add some humor (with misspelled words) and nostalgia, but if the student had either connected the quote they chose to the idea of overcoming a fear present in the other two anecdotes or if they had picked a different quote all together related to their shyness, it would have made the entire essay feel more cohesive.

Where to Get Your Personal Statement Edited

Do you want feedback on your personal statement? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays.

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for you to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

Next Step: Supplemental Essays

Essay Guides for Each School

How to Write a Stellar Extracurricular Activity College Essay

4 Tips for Writing a Diversity College Essay

How to Write the “Why This College” Essay

How to Masterfully Describe Your Personality in an Essay

By: Tasha Kolesnikova

What's your personality type? Knowing your personality traits and the ability to describe them in written form will help you in all aspects of your life - from your first day in school until your last job. For instance, one practical application of such essays is to impress hiring managers with your cover letter and job interviews. Being able to answer the "tell me about yourself" query properly not only enables you to answer interview questions and explain why you fit the job description perfectly but also helps you navigate through your work-life and relationships with your co-workers.

Theory of Temperaments

How to Describe Your Personality in a Paragraph Wi

Short Essay on My Personality

Sample essay on your personality, why is it not an a+ essay, what to consider when writing your analysis essay:.

What Questions to Answer When Writing About Your P

What should be included in my personality essay?

How can I intertwine society, understanding, and p
How do I ensure the situations mentioned are refle

Your Portrait - Select the Key Characteristics

You don't necessarily need a personality test to know your personality. But how would you describe yourself? Talking about yourself may be hard. However, knowing yourself well is essential for profound communication skills and adaptability.

Every person has weaknesses in their personality as well. When writing your personality essay for your job application, for example, you can choose weaknesses that are unimportant to the position you're applying for, such as being shy or having limited experience. You can also include traits that you consider a weakness but can actually also be your strengths, like being self-critical or being competitive.

Theories on Personality

How does your personality develop over time? There are many explanations scattered around with different theories in various studies. One of them is the Theory of Temperaments.

This is the earliest known theory from Hippocrates. He divided personality based on four temperaments connected to bodily fluids he referred to as "humor."

Using Adjectives in Your Essay

Which descriptions fit you the best? Before you write your essay, remember that you should establish a bond between you and your reader. Using adjectives will help you in creating that connection. Adjectives are critical in expressing ourselves and how we relate with others. They help us explain and give specific information in our answers that will make others get to know us better.

Think of the words you associate with yourself the most or find synonyms you can use in your essay. You can take advantage of thesaurus sites online like WordHippo and Synonymy to properly convey your personality type. For example, you can talk about your conscientiousness or substitute it with simpler words like "dedicated" or "ethical" so your readers will easily understand what you mean.

How to Describe Your Personality in a Paragraph With Examples

When constructing a personality paragraph, it's imperative to identify and integrate aspects like values, knowledge, and behavior, to offer a rounded depiction of oneself.

Personality paragraph examples:

A well-rounded personality paragraph, brimming with real-life examples, not only describes traits but also the influences and motivations behind them, providing a more insightful glimpse into one’s character.

Crafting an authentic and introspective essay on my personality profile involves a meticulous exploration of self, allowing for a candid reflection on how I perceive and project myself.

To start, my personality essay introduction would offer a synopsis of my character, allowing a sneak peek into my temperament, beliefs, and capabilities.

Knowing how to describe your personality in an essay involves weaving a narrative that captures not only individual traits but also emotions, thoughts, abilities, and the influence of family and surroundings on one's personality.

A short personality essay should also depict my interactions with individuals, illustrating how relationships have shaped and continue to mold my character. Describing my personality essay entails delving into factual and nuanced reflections of my personal experiences and interactions, providing a multidimensional view of my individuality.

When considering how to write an essay about your personality, combining self-awareness with an honest and engaging narrative is crucial for creating a resonant and comprehensive portrayal.

Your peers may ask you to make an essay to prepare you for a situation when you will have to reply to the hiring managers' requests. An example of this essay is as follows:

Each individual has a personality that is unique to them, making them irreplaceable. This makes humans interesting because everyone has different experiences and reasons why they behave and feel the way they do. The three traits that describe me the most are as follows: honest, reliable, and ambitious.

I live by a strict code of honesty. Not only was I raised by my parents to always tell the truth but also because it became an integral part of my life that I can't imagine myself trying to lie. Being honest helped me keep my relationships with my family and friends strong. This is because, at any time that we have misunderstandings, we talk about it openly.

Me being honest contributes to my reliability. When I give someone my word, I always intend to keep it. I apply this philosophy at all times: from small routine tasks to critical projects on which many things depend.

I am an ambitious person, as I want to achieve all the goals that I set in life. New accomplishments make me extremely happy and help me to dream big!

The sample essay you have just read could be assessed with a B- grade. But how to make it an A+?

To be fair, the essay's introduction is rather good. It talks on the topic from a general perspective, narrowing it down to the essay's focus – the author's personality. However, to make this introductory paragraph a brilliant one, think of a more gradual transition, for instance:

"There are no two personalities that are the same, and that's the beauty of it! I always like seeing myself as a part of a shining galaxy, spreading my unique light among other fellow stars. If I think about what character traits make up my bright shine, the three major pillars that come to mind are honesty, reliability, and a great deal of ambition."

This introduction uses metaphors and will definitely be remembered by the reader!

The sample essay's main body also has parts that require improvement. While the paragraph about reliability has a connection with the previous one, the part where the author talks about ambition seems disconnected. Adding just one sentence could fix this issue:

"Speaking of grand projects, I have plenty – after all, I'm an ambitious person."

Also, it is highly advisable to elaborate on the topic. In this essay, for example, the author could share some plans or dreams with the reader, making the story more personal and relatable.

Finally, the sample essay is lacking a conclusion. Summarize what you've already said and make a memorable statement to end your essay, for example:

"As you can see, I am quite a mix. As challenging as being honest, reliable, and ambitious at the same time may be, I try to make the best of it!"

Tips on Creating a Brilliant Essay About Yourself

Writing an essay about your personality can be tough, especially if you're an introvert, as it's the same as showing your inner self to other people. In fact, you will need to brainstorm and explain why you have that personality trait - how you acquired it and why you're keeping it with you until now.

Organization. Make a draft about what you want to talk about in your essay.
Structure. Don't forget to write a great introduction, with the body supporting your points, and end it with a proper conclusion.
Honesty. Talk about your real personality traits while highlighting the positive ones. Don't write traits you don't have.

What Questions to Answer When Writing About Your Personality:

1. What are the personality traits I have that I am most proud of?

Focus on traits that help make you an asset to anyone you work with. Play up your extraversion and downplay any neuroticism.

2. Why do I have these traits, and do I plan to keep them?

Expound on how you acquired these traits - were they because you were raised with these manners, or is it because of an experience you had where you realized these behaviors help? Make your readers relate to your encounters.

3. How will these traits help me in my daily life and at my workplace?

Elaborate on why you're proud of these traits and how they make your relationships flourish. Give emphasis to behaviors that assist you in having a better relationship with people. After all, teamwork is all about people's personalities working well together.

Find it difficult to describe your personality in an essay? You can rely on Studybay!

Our experts help students with:

essay writing
essay editing
homework in different subjects

Your personality essay should include a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Begin with a general introduction of yourself, delve deeper into specific traits, values, and experiences in the body, and summarize the main points in the conclusion. Integrate real-life examples and facts to add depth and authenticity to your essay.

How can I intertwine society, understanding, and problems in an essay about my personality?

When writing an essay on my personality, briefly discuss how societal issues and what you learn from them shape your character and actions. For instance, mention a specific societal problem that has influenced your views, values, or behavior, illustrating the interconnectedness of your personality and your environment in a concise manner.

How do I ensure the situations mentioned are reflective of my personality in an essay about my personality type?

In your paper, outline your personality type clearly and illustrate with a situation showing its impact and interaction with society. Use real-life examples to demonstrate how your personality perceives and responds to societal contexts, ensuring a cohesive and authentic representation in your essay.

User ratings:

User ratings is 4.7 stars.

4.7 /5 ( 190 Votes)

Content Writer

I studied sociology and marketing at Europa-Universität Viadrina (Germany) and Universidade da Beira Interior (Portugal). When I was a sophomore, back in 2018, I decided to put what I've learned into practice, so I got my first job in digital marketing. I currently work in the content marketing department at Studybay, building strong, effective, and respectful communication between the platform and our clients.

Add Your Comment

We are very interested to know your opinion

I really appreciate and understood!

Nabila Abdulmalik

A well explained article here. I'm happy. Regards!

mathias porep

This article is very helpful, in my opinion. I was having trouble with "how do you know your personality?" essay and this helped me a lot. 🙌

What a great article! This gave me a lot of ideas for how to begin an essay about myself and my personality.

💭 To be honest, I always find it hard to write a personality paragraph. At school, it's tough for me to figure out which of my qualities to stress, and it's difficult to stay honest and fair.

Discussing how can I describe my personality in a paragraph examples made me reflect on my own experiences. School has always pushed me to explore this but it’s never been easy.

Thank you So much for example

Upgrade your writing skills!

Try our AI essay writer from Studybay today!

Personality Traits Essay

To find inspiration for your paper and overcome writer’s block
As a source of information (ensure proper referencing)
As a template for you assignment

The study of personality traits has always been a fascinating subject for researchers. In this personality traits essay, the author dives into the personality theories that explain an individual’s unique personality. From extroversion to conscientiousness, this essay on personality traits will explore the different elements that shape our behavior and interactions with the world. The paper aims to comprehensively understand the complexity of human personality and its impact on our daily lives.

Introduction

Research/theories.

Different individuals are characterized by different physiological and psychological characteristics or values. Collectively, these factors contribute significantly to the nature of the behavior of these individuals. The term personality trait refers to these intrinsic differences in individuals that remain outstanding and stable throughout the life of the individuals.

In many individuals these intrinsic differences remain a personal and constant aspect that explains why the individual behave or react towards situations the way the do. Personality theories explain that individuals have distinctive and characteristic behavior which remains distinctive throughout a variety of situations.

Humans are in one way or another compelled to articulating a certain behavioral pattern and to identify or note differences in the way other people behave. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

Personality trait theories try to explain the differences in behavior patterns that are displayed by different personalities in similar situations. They as well try to explain why individuals behave differently in such situations. An individual can be said to be cheerful, talkative, cold, compulsive, and intelligent.

It can be noted that these personality traits remains more or less consistent over a long period of time or probably they last over a life time. What brings continuity in a person’s behavior characteristic is described as his or her personality.

Lexical hypothesis has found it extended application in describing personality traits. According to the hypothesis, people become used to characteristic differences more and more until they finally get engrossed into their languages of communication.

The hypothesis argue that the more important a difference is, the more people will notice it and the more they will talk about it and consequently they will invent a word for it. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

Researchers extracted from a list of 18000 words and came up with the Big Five Personality Factors. There factors happens to be very similar to the Five Factor Model of Personality. These Five Personality Factors includes:

Extraversion. Examples include talkative, extroverted, aggressive, bold, assertive, unrestrained, shy, quiet, untalkative and confident.
Agreeableness. Examples include sympathetic, kind, warm, considerate, cold, unsympathetic, unkind, helpful, affectionate and truthful.
Conscientiousness. Examples include organized, orderly, neat, disorganized, disorderly, careless and sloppy.
Emotional stability. Examples include relaxed, unenvious, unexcitable, patient, moody, temperamental, touchy, envious irritable and self-pity.
Intellect. Examples include creative, intellectual, imaginative, philosophical, unimaginative, uncreative, unsophisticated and imperceptive. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

As earlier stated, personality traits last for long period of time and in many cases they extend throughout the life of the individual. Sources have shown that it is these personal attributes that form integration web among our communities. In the process of understanding oneself, it becomes substantially important for one to understand, accept and apply his or her personality traits. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

Social unacceptability is connected to social inclusion or exclusion from certain social groupings. The issue of exclusion or inclusion is a major decision the humans as social animals have to take care of. An individual is either included or excluded from certain social entities.

A different approach on defining personality trait aimed at identifying descriptive nouns. From this research, there was development of the Eight Factor Model of Personality traits. According to this model, the eight factors that are a part and parcel of people personality tarts are; social unacceptability, intellect, egocentrism, ruggedness, delinquency, attractiveness, liveliness and disorientation.

According to this development, characteristic traits such as lawbreaker, alcoholic, rebel, comedian, speculator, daydreamer, tough, dummy, moron, poet, aggressor and many others were developed. (Emotional Competency, 2009). The above eight factors can be seen to correlate with people primal concerns as follows:

Intellect refers to the level of enlightenment in matters that affect the community at large. The levels of intelligency place humans at different social orientations. Sometimes the level of intelligence is seen as the levels of evolutionary advancement and therefore distinguishes humans that belong to a certain generational grouping.
Egocentrism on the other hand relates to lack of empathy and concern for others. It sometimes can be presented as a false self-image or someone being overzealous.
The fourth factor, ruggedness relates to aggression, dominance and hunger to attain power.
Delinquency is more or less similar to cheating. The importance and effectiveness of cheater detectors within the society cannot be overemphasized as explained in the theory of reciprocal altruism.
Sex and procreating are bonded together in this sixth factor of personality trait.
Factor seven is related to attracting attention. This factor is termed as important in attracting attention especially from mates of the opposite sex.
Disorientation relates to reliability and competence of a person. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

According to the developed theories, personality trait understanding are very critical if understanding different behavior patterns that are displayed by different persons is anything to go by.(Emotional Competency, 2009).

It is therefore important to understand ones personal trait so that if there is anything negative about how e behave, one can consider the possibility of averting from it. This is necessary because some of these traits are detrimental in the way we live and relate with those who live with us. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

Emotional Competency. (2009). Personality Traits . Web.

Personal Responsibility as a Students Success Strategy
The Relationship Between Psychology and the Preservation of the Environment
The Nature of Crime: Underlying Drivers Making People Criminals
British Museum's Ownership of Parthenon Marbles
French Culture, Values, and Language
Social Psychology: Individual and Environment Behavior
The Implications of Technology on Human Behavior
An Informal Learning Experience
The Theory of Psychological Egoism
Social Psychology Concepts in a Discourse Interpretation
Chicago (A-D)
Chicago (N-B)

IvyPanda. (2019, March 28). Personality Traits Essay. https://ivypanda.com/essays/personality-traits/

"Personality Traits Essay." IvyPanda , 28 Mar. 2019, ivypanda.com/essays/personality-traits/.

IvyPanda . (2019) 'Personality Traits Essay'. 28 March.

IvyPanda . 2019. "Personality Traits Essay." March 28, 2019. https://ivypanda.com/essays/personality-traits/.

1. IvyPanda . "Personality Traits Essay." March 28, 2019. https://ivypanda.com/essays/personality-traits/.

Bibliography

IvyPanda . "Personality Traits Essay." March 28, 2019. https://ivypanda.com/essays/personality-traits/.

Have a language expert improve your writing

Run a free plagiarism check in 10 minutes, generate accurate citations for free.

Knowledge Base
Applying to graduate school
How to Write Your Personal Statement | Strategies & Examples

How to Write Your Personal Statement | Strategies & Examples

Published on February 12, 2019 by Shona McCombes . Revised on July 3, 2023.

A personal statement is a short essay of around 500–1,000 words, in which you tell a compelling story about who you are, what drives you, and why you’re applying.

To write a successful personal statement for a graduate school application , don’t just summarize your experience; instead, craft a focused narrative in your own voice. Aim to demonstrate three things:

Your personality: what are your interests, values, and motivations?
Your talents: what can you bring to the program?
Your goals: what do you hope the program will do for you?

This article guides you through some winning strategies to build a strong, well-structured personal statement for a master’s or PhD application. You can download the full examples below.

Urban Planning Psychology History

Getting started with your personal statement, the introduction: start with an attention-grabbing opening, the main body: craft your narrative, the conclusion: look ahead, revising, editing, and proofreading your personal statement, frequently asked questions, other interesting articles.

Before you start writing, the first step is to understand exactly what’s expected of you. If the application gives you a question or prompt for your personal statement, the most important thing is to respond to it directly.

For example, you might be asked to focus on the development of your personal identity; challenges you have faced in your life; or your career motivations. This will shape your focus and emphasis—but you still need to find your own unique approach to answering it.

There’s no universal template for a personal statement; it’s your chance to be creative and let your own voice shine through. But there are strategies you can use to build a compelling, well-structured story.

The first paragraph of your personal statement should set the tone and lead smoothly into the story you want to tell.

Strategy 1: Open with a concrete scene

An effective way to catch the reader’s attention is to set up a scene that illustrates something about your character and interests. If you’re stuck, try thinking about:

A personal experience that changed your perspective
A story from your family’s history
A memorable teacher or learning experience
An unusual or unexpected encounter

To write an effective scene, try to go beyond straightforward description; start with an intriguing sentence that pulls the reader in, and give concrete details to create a convincing atmosphere.

Strategy 2: Open with your motivations

To emphasize your enthusiasm and commitment, you can start by explaining your interest in the subject you want to study or the career path you want to follow.

Just stating that it interests you isn’t enough: first, you need to figure out why you’re interested in this field:

Is it a longstanding passion or a recent discovery?
Does it come naturally or have you had to work hard at it?
How does it fit into the rest of your life?
What do you think it contributes to society?

Tips for the introduction

Don’t start on a cliche: avoid phrases like “Ever since I was a child…” or “For as long as I can remember…”
Do save the introduction for last. If you’re struggling to come up with a strong opening, leave it aside, and note down any interesting ideas that occur to you as you write the rest of the personal statement.

Once you’ve set up the main themes of your personal statement, you’ll delve into more detail about your experiences and motivations.

To structure the body of your personal statement, there are various strategies you can use.

Strategy 1: Describe your development over time

One of the simplest strategies is to give a chronological overview of key experiences that have led you to apply for graduate school.

What first sparked your interest in the field?
Which classes, assignments, classmates, internships, or other activities helped you develop your knowledge and skills?
Where do you want to go next? How does this program fit into your future plans?

Don’t try to include absolutely everything you’ve done—pick out highlights that are relevant to your application. Aim to craft a compelling narrative that shows how you’ve changed and actively developed yourself.

My interest in psychology was first sparked early in my high school career. Though somewhat scientifically inclined, I found that what interested me most was not the equations we learned about in physics and chemistry, but the motivations and perceptions of my fellow students, and the subtle social dynamics that I observed inside and outside the classroom. I wanted to learn how our identities, beliefs, and behaviours are shaped through our interactions with others, so I decided to major in Social Psychology. My undergraduate studies deepened my understanding of, and fascination with, the interplay between an individual mind and its social context.During my studies, I acquired a solid foundation of knowledge about concepts like social influence and group dynamics, but I also took classes on various topics not strictly related to my major. I was particularly interested in how other fields intersect with psychology—the classes I took on media studies, biology, and literature all enhanced my understanding of psychological concepts by providing different lenses through which to look at the issues involved.

Strategy 2: Own your challenges and obstacles

If your path to graduate school hasn’t been easy or straightforward, you can turn this into a strength, and structure your personal statement as a story of overcoming obstacles.

Is your social, cultural or economic background underrepresented in the field? Show how your experiences will contribute a unique perspective.
Do you have gaps in your resume or lower-than-ideal grades? Explain the challenges you faced and how you dealt with them.

Don’t focus too heavily on negatives, but use them to highlight your positive qualities. Resilience, resourcefulness and perseverance make you a promising graduate school candidate.

Growing up working class, urban decay becomes depressingly familiar. The sight of a row of abandoned houses does not surprise me, but it continues to bother me. Since high school, I have been determined to pursue a career in urban planning. While people of my background experience the consequences of urban planning decisions first-hand, we are underrepresented in the field itself. Ironically, given my motivation, my economic background has made my studies challenging. I was fortunate enough to be awarded a scholarship for my undergraduate studies, but after graduation I took jobs in unrelated fields to help support my parents. In the three years since, I have not lost my ambition. Now I am keen to resume my studies, and I believe I can bring an invaluable perspective to the table: that of the people most impacted by the decisions of urban planners.

Strategy 3: Demonstrate your knowledge of the field

Especially if you’re applying for a PhD or another research-focused program, it’s a good idea to show your familiarity with the subject and the department. Your personal statement can focus on the area you want to specialize in and reflect on why it matters to you.

Reflect on the topics or themes that you’ve focused on in your studies. What draws you to them?
Discuss any academic achievements, influential teachers, or other highlights of your education.
Talk about the questions you’d like to explore in your research and why you think they’re important.

The personal statement isn’t a research proposal , so don’t go overboard on detail—but it’s a great opportunity to show your enthusiasm for the field and your capacity for original thinking.

In applying for this research program, my intention is to build on the multidisciplinary approach I have taken in my studies so far, combining knowledge from disparate fields of study to better understand psychological concepts and issues. The Media Psychology program stands out to me as the perfect environment for this kind of research, given its researchers’ openness to collaboration across diverse fields. I am impressed by the department’s innovative interdisciplinary projects that focus on the shifting landscape of media and technology, and I hope that my own work can follow a similarly trailblazing approach. More specifically, I want to develop my understanding of the intersection of psychology and media studies, and explore how media psychology theories and methods might be applied to neurodivergent minds. I am interested not only in media psychology but also in psychological disorders, and how the two interact. This is something I touched on during my undergraduate studies and that I’m excited to delve into further.

Strategy 4: Discuss your professional ambitions

Especially if you’re applying for a more professionally-oriented program (such as an MBA), it’s a good idea to focus on concrete goals and how the program will help you achieve them.

If your career is just getting started, show how your character is suited to the field, and explain how graduate school will help you develop your talents.
If you have already worked in the profession, show what you’ve achieved so far, and explain how the program will allow you to take the next step.
If you are planning a career change, explain what has driven this decision and how your existing experience will help you succeed.

Don’t just state the position you want to achieve. You should demonstrate that you’ve put plenty of thought into your career plans and show why you’re well-suited to this profession.

One thing that fascinated me about the field during my undergraduate studies was the sheer number of different elements whose interactions constitute a person’s experience of an urban environment. Any number of factors could transform the scene I described at the beginning: What if there were no bus route? Better community outreach in the neighborhood? Worse law enforcement? More or fewer jobs available in the area? Some of these factors are out of the hands of an urban planner, but without taking them all into consideration, the planner has an incomplete picture of their task. Through further study I hope to develop my understanding of how these disparate elements combine and interact to create the urban environment. I am interested in the social, psychological and political effects our surroundings have on our lives. My studies will allow me to work on projects directly affecting the kinds of working-class urban communities I know well. I believe I can bring my own experiences, as well as my education, to bear upon the problem of improving infrastructure and quality of life in these communities.

Tips for the main body

Don’t rehash your resume by trying to summarize everything you’ve done so far; the personal statement isn’t about listing your academic or professional experience, but about reflecting, evaluating, and relating it to broader themes.
Do make your statements into stories: Instead of saying you’re hard-working and self-motivated, write about your internship where you took the initiative to start a new project. Instead of saying you’ve always loved reading, reflect on a novel or poem that changed your perspective.

Your conclusion should bring the focus back to the program and what you hope to get out of it, whether that’s developing practical skills, exploring intellectual questions, or both.

Emphasize the fit with your specific interests, showing why this program would be the best way to achieve your aims.

Strategy 1: What do you want to know?

If you’re applying for a more academic or research-focused program, end on a note of curiosity: what do you hope to learn, and why do you think this is the best place to learn it?

If there are specific classes or faculty members that you’re excited to learn from, this is the place to express your enthusiasm.

Strategy 2: What do you want to do?

If you’re applying for a program that focuses more on professional training, your conclusion can look to your career aspirations: what role do you want to play in society, and why is this program the best choice to help you get there?

Tips for the conclusion

Don’t summarize what you’ve already said. You have limited space in a personal statement, so use it wisely!
Do think bigger than yourself: try to express how your individual aspirations relate to your local community, your academic field, or society more broadly. It’s not just about what you’ll get out of graduate school, but about what you’ll be able to give back.

You’ll be expected to do a lot of writing in graduate school, so make a good first impression: leave yourself plenty of time to revise and polish the text.

Your style doesn’t have to be as formal as other kinds of academic writing, but it should be clear, direct and coherent. Make sure that each paragraph flows smoothly from the last, using topic sentences and transitions to create clear connections between each part.

Don’t be afraid to rewrite and restructure as much as necessary. Since you have a lot of freedom in the structure of a personal statement, you can experiment and move information around to see what works best.

Finally, it’s essential to carefully proofread your personal statement and fix any language errors. Before you submit your application, consider investing in professional personal statement editing . For $150, you have the peace of mind that your personal statement is grammatically correct, strong in term of your arguments, and free of awkward mistakes.

A statement of purpose is usually more formal, focusing on your academic or professional goals. It shouldn’t include anything that isn’t directly relevant to the application.

A personal statement can often be more creative. It might tell a story that isn’t directly related to the application, but that shows something about your personality, values, and motivations.

However, both types of document have the same overall goal: to demonstrate your potential as a graduate student and s how why you’re a great match for the program.

The typical length of a personal statement for graduate school applications is between 500 and 1,000 words.

Different programs have different requirements, so always check if there’s a minimum or maximum length and stick to the guidelines. If there is no recommended word count, aim for no more than 1-2 pages.

If you’re applying to multiple graduate school programs, you should tailor your personal statement to each application.

Some applications provide a prompt or question. In this case, you might have to write a new personal statement from scratch: the most important task is to respond to what you have been asked.

If there’s no prompt or guidelines, you can re-use the same idea for your personal statement – but change the details wherever relevant, making sure to emphasize why you’re applying to this specific program.

If the application also includes other essays, such as a statement of purpose , you might have to revise your personal statement to avoid repeating the same information.

If you want to know more about college essays , academic writing , and AI tools , make sure to check out some of our other language articles with explanations, examples, and quizzes.

College essays

College essay examples
College essay format
College essay style
College essay length
Diversity essays
Scholarship essays

Academic writing

Writing process
Avoiding repetition
Literature review
Conceptual framework
Dissertation outline
Thesis acknowledgements
Burned or burnt
Canceled or cancelled
Dreamt or dreamed
Gray or grey
Theater vs theatre

Cite this Scribbr article

If you want to cite this source, you can copy and paste the citation or click the “Cite this Scribbr article” button to automatically add the citation to our free Citation Generator.

McCombes, S. (2023, July 03). How to Write Your Personal Statement | Strategies & Examples. Scribbr. Retrieved July 30, 2024, from https://www.scribbr.com/graduate-school/personal-statement/

Is this article helpful?

Shona McCombes

Other students also liked, how to write a graduate school resume | template & example, how (and who) to ask for a letter of recommendation, master's vs phd | a complete guide to the differences, get unlimited documents corrected.

✔ Free APA citation check included ✔ Unlimited document corrections ✔ Specialized in correcting academic texts

Skip to main content
Skip to secondary menu
Skip to primary sidebar
Skip to footer

A Plus Topper

Improve your Grades

My Personality Essay | Sample Essay on My Personality for Students and Children in English

June 23, 2021 by Prasanna

My Personality Essay: The personality of a person is the reflection of their good and bad habits. One should always develop good habits in himself/herself and avoid the bad ones. These habits make the personality of one person different from another. Your personality is what your character is. It comprises various trademark qualities and propensities which help me make a fair person. Certain parts of our personality are acceptable while there are other negative sides too. Notwithstanding, coming up next are the better parts of our character.

Knowing your personality characteristics and the capacity to portray them in a composed structure will help you in all parts of your life – from your first day in school until your last work. For example, one pragmatic use of such articles is to dazzle recruiting chiefs with your introductory letter and prospective employee meetings. Having the option to answer the “enlighten me concerning yourself” inquiry appropriately not just empowers you to respond to inquiries and clarify why you fit the expected set of responsibilities impeccably yet additionally assists you with exploring through your work-life and associations with your colleagues.

You can read more Essay Writing about articles, events, people, sports, technology many more.

Sample Essay on My Personality

Personality is one viewpoint that we as a whole are being dissected on. personality characterizes what our identity is and what we are. A few groups have extraordinary characters, while others might not have that satisfying and engaging character. We should continually have a decent personality to be a superior individual.

Personality lies in numerous things that we convey in ourselves. The manner in which we dress, the language we talk, how we act with others, our mentality, etc. The most significant of everything is the manner by which we handle a circumstance, utilizing legitimate cerebrums and thinking great. When in an emergency, as opposed to hopping into ends, one ought to consistently be prudent and think rapidly and admirably and afterward act in a like manner. This load includes as a part of our character.

Another significant factor is the way merry you are. We all really like to be in the organization of glad and bright individuals, similarly, individuals likewise anticipate something similar from us. Maybe then being miserable and ill-humored, when one is lively and tells wisecracks when in a group, they would be valued and acknowledged a lot quicker than the individuals who don’t end up falling in here.

Personality fundamentally duplicates what we have inside us. The attributes that one obtains throughout some stretch of time, fosters our character. The personality of one individual depends on a few elements. A few attributes are inherent, while others are acquired and some others actually being noticed, learned and joined while reaching out to others and circumstances around. In spite of the fact that a few characters are given to us as a gift, we reserve the privilege to sustain it and foster it for the advancement of ourselves and this would consequently reflect in our great personality as well.

One must be consistently satisfactory, presentable and sharp engaged in musings and acts, to be acknowledged and adored by all and to be in control of an individual with incredible character. Personality simply doesn’t occur incidentally, one necessity to have incredible devotion and pursue to foster societies and routines that would help in developing one’s character.

My Personality Small Paragraphs

Everybody has one, yet no two people groups characters are something very similar. Personality is for the most part what your identity is and the fundamental characteristics and convictions that an individual has. The word reference definition for Personality is A: The Sum complete of the physical, mental, passionate, and social attributes of a person. B: The coordinated example of conduct attributes of the person. A person’s personality is the manner by which he finds a way into society. Nobody has a similar personality to another. He may have comparative characteristics yet never can their characters be by and large something similar.

Personality consists of three sections: Biological Influence, Psychological Influence, and Social Influence. A people’s Biological Influence consists of somebody’s hereditarily decided demeanor and the autonomic sensory system and his mind action. Mental Influences are a person’s learned reactions, his oblivious perspectives and his hopeful or cynical perspective. The Social-Cultural impacts consist of youth encounters and people’s social assumptions and social help. As the year’s pass, life gets an ever-increasing number of confounded, particularly the adolescent years. Everybody’s characters are continually changing, which is normal due to the progressions that they carry on with throughout everyday life. Something that happens to them may change the manner in which they consider that circumstance for eternity.

FAQ’s on My Personality Essay

Question 1. How to write an essay on personality?

Answer: In the event that the exposition is about you, meet your loved ones about your character. Compose the blueprint for your exposition. Your presentation ought to clarify who you are expounding on and why you decided to zero in on that individual. The presentation ought to likewise diagram the central matters of your article.

Question 2. How to describe our personality?

Answer: Personality accepts states of mind, perspectives, and feelings and is most obviously communicated in associations with others. It incorporates conduct attributes, both intrinsic and gained, that recognize one individual from another and that can be seen in individuals’ relations to the climate and to the gathering of people.

Question 3. What is the best way to improve your personality?

Be a superior audience
Understand more and extend your inclinations
Be a decent conversationalist
Make decisions
Meet New People
Act naturally
Have an inspirational perspective and demeanor
Be fun and see the diverting side of life
Picture Dictionary
English Speech
English Slogans
English Letter Writing
English Essay Writing
English Textbook Answers
Types of Certificates
ICSE Solutions
Selina ICSE Solutions
ML Aggarwal Solutions
HSSLive Plus One
HSSLive Plus Two
Kerala SSLC
Distance Education

Calculate for all schools

Your chance of acceptance, your chancing factors, extracurriculars, personal characteristics essay.

Hi everyone! I'm working on a personal characteristics essay for a college application and wondering if you could guide me on what to include. What kind of qualities and experiences would be most effective to write about? Thanks in advance!

Hello! Writing a personal characteristics essay is a great opportunity to showcase the unique qualities and experiences that make you stand out as an applicant. Here are a few tips to help you highlight these aspects effectively:

1. Self-awareness and self-reflection: Colleges appreciate students who can look inward and are aware of their strengths, weaknesses, and growth opportunities. Reflect on how you've grown over time, what challenges you've faced, and how you've overcome them. This demonstrates maturity and a willingness to learn from your experiences.

2. Genuine passion: Choose qualities that genuinely resonate with you rather than those you think the admissions officers want to hear. Be authentic about what excites you and how it has shaped your goals or aspirations. This will make your essay more engaging and relatable.

3. Show, don't tell: Instead of simply stating your qualities, use anecdotes or experiences to illustrate them. You could describe a specific project, extracurricular activity, or event where you demonstrated leadership, creativity, resilience, or another characteristic. This makes your essay more memorable and helps the reader better understand your personality.

4. Be specific: Avoid generic statements like "I'm a hard worker" or "I'm a good leader." Instead, focus on specific examples that showcase these qualities. For instance, you could discuss a time when you managed a team project under tight deadlines or when you took the initiative to start a new club at school.

5. Highlight your impact: Discuss the impact your personal characteristics have had on others, such as your friends, family, or community. This could include volunteer work, tutoring others, or participating in group activities where your qualities positively influenced the outcome.

6. Balance: While it's important to showcase your strengths, also recognize areas where you could improve. This shows humility and a commitment to personal growth, further enhancing your self-awareness.

7. Keep it concise and well-organized: Focus on a few key characteristics and experiences, rather than trying to cover too much ground. Make sure your essay has a clear structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs for each quality or experience, and a conclusion that ties everything together.

In summary, when writing a personal characteristics essay, focus on being self-aware, genuine, specific, and impactful. Use anecdotes and experiences to illustrate your qualities, while remaining concise and well-organized. Good luck with your essay!

About CollegeVine’s Expert FAQ

CollegeVine’s Q&A seeks to offer informed perspectives on commonly asked admissions questions. Every answer is refined and validated by our team of admissions experts to ensure it resonates with trusted knowledge in the field.

Home / Essay Samples / Sociology / Personal Qualities

Personal Qualities Essay Examples

The who am i reflection: a journey of self-discovery.

Who am I? In this reflection essay I'll explore my identity and values shaped by my family, experiences, and personal beliefs. People say that I am a very shy person, that I do not talk a lot. Although I might come out as a shy...

Resiliency and Adaptability: Key Traits of the Filipino Spirit

Values are something that disciplines a person’s attitude. It is a judgement of what is the importance of life. Human values guide the person on how to interact with other people. In line with this, Filipino values are set of values that Filipinos have historically...

The Power of Personal Qualities: a Reflection

Personal qualities are the unique attributes that define who we are as individuals. They shape our character, influence our actions, and contribute to our interactions with the world around us. Throughout my journey, I have come to appreciate the profound impact that personal qualities can...

Being Self-aware: Knowing What Are My Weaknesses Or Vulnerabilities

My qualities comprise of positivity, motivation, diligence, and love. I pick these four since I feel that I am most dependable in these parts of my life. Being sure is a huge factor in all that I do. I generally need to be cheerful and...

Values and Personal Credo Examples

Qualities are the properties that shape who we are as a person. There are many qualities which can change throughout life and there are ones which I believe will accompany us in our lifetime. As far as I am concerned, some qualities such as having...

Becoming a Successful Student: the Concept of Independent Learning

In this independent essay there will be an attempt to describe the concept of independed learning style and whether it is more useful to become a successful student. This essay is based on personal experience. So independent learning is a process and a philosophy by...

Exploring What Makes a Great Teacher

Great teachers are more than instructors; they are mentors, inspirers, and cultivators of lifelong learning. This essay delves into the qualities that distinguish a great teacher, examining the traits that foster effective learning, create meaningful connections, and leave a lasting impact on students' lives. By...

Introvert Vs Extrovert: Compare and Contrast Analysis

Have you ever wondered why some people keep to themselves or how others are super talkative? There are two kinds of people in the world. They are either introverts or extroverts. These two things can mainly be based on personality level, how your childhood was,...

Rap Vs Narcissism

In the article “Rhythm and Lyrics of Rap Music Do Not Change Narcissistic Personality State”, the authors Kristen Craft and Robert Elsner share their opinion that there is not a direct connection between lyrics in rap and narcissistic behavior traits. While it could be easy...

Personal Qualities of an Effective Manager

There are many defining qualities that individual must possess and demonstrate for a company to consider one successful manager; education, age, and experience are merely not enough. However, these considerations may vary depending on the size of the team or staff and the type of...

Trying to find an excellent essay sample but no results?

Don’t waste your time and get a professional writer to help!