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or a to test the data. Generate Random Question Track Time Generate Outline Find Vocabulary Phân tích đề bài (coming soon) Chat with AI About This Topic Generate Sample Essay (0.3 LC) Chat with AI About This Essay Highlight & Correct Grammar a word, sentence, or paragraph, then (Windows) (MacOS) to open the , please login to reset! Check Score (0.1 LC) (+2 LC) (+0.5 LC) (+0.2 LC) (+17 LC) and click ‘Check Score’! The introduction provides a general context about advertising but lacks a clear thesis statement that directly addresses the prompt. It should explicitly state your position regarding the ethics of advertising. For example, “I strongly agree that many advertising methods are unethical and unacceptable in today’s society.” The flow of ideas is somewhat disjointed. Using transitional phrases could help connect thoughts more effectively. There are grammatical issues such as “intent to have more watcher” → “intend to have more viewers” and “regardless to its consequences” → “regardless of its consequences.” The vocabulary is basic; consider using more sophisticated language. For example, “worldwide nations” could be replaced with “countries around the world.” The paragraph presents an example but lacks clarity and depth. The argument could be strengthened by discussing the impact of such advertisements on consumer behavior and family dynamics more thoroughly. The points are not well-organized. Consider using clearer topic sentences and linking phrases to improve flow. There are several grammatical mistakes, such as “some families my does not need” → “some families may not need,” and “his poor father will be finally obliged” → “his father may feel compelled to buy.” The vocabulary is quite simplistic. Phrases like “home wife” could be replaced with “homemaker,” and “high demand” could be better expressed as “increased desire.” The paragraph introduces another point but lacks specificity. More concrete examples and analysis of the psychological effects of advertising would strengthen your argument. The organization could be improved. Use clearer topic sentences and transitions to enhance coherence. There are grammatical errors such as “In second point” → “In the second point” and “the ideal of a manhood” → “the ideal of manhood.” The vocabulary is repetitive and lacks sophistication. Consider using terms like “manipulate” instead of “attract.” The conclusion summarizes the argument but lacks a strong final statement. It would benefit from reiterating your main position more emphatically. The flow is somewhat choppy. Consider rephrasing for better clarity and coherence. There are grammatical issues such as “regardless to the bad effects” → “regardless of the negative effects” and “will made them due to make their customers satisfying” → “create advertisements to satisfy their customers.” The vocabulary is quite basic. Phrases like “bad effects” could be replaced with “adverse consequences.”Error | Correction | Explanation |
---|---|---|
“…some families does not need…” | “…some families not need…” | “my” is incorrect; it should be “may” to indicate possibility. |
“…as home wife see the advertisement…” | “…as homemaker the advertisement…” | “home wife” is not standard English; “sees” should be in the present tense. |
“…will have high demand while they are watching…” | “…will have a high demand when they watch…” | “high demand” needs an article; use “when” for better flow. |
“…crying all time.” | “…crying all the time.” | Missing article “the.” |
“…his poor father will be finally obliged…” | “…his father may feel compelled…” | “obliged” is not the best choice; “compelled” is more appropriate in this context. |
“…by displaying a young lady with …” | “…by displaying a young lady with a …” | “fitness body” is not a common phrase; “fit body” is more standard. |
“…if we go deep in down will understand…” | “…if we delve deeper, we will understand…” | “go deep in down” is awkward; “delve deeper” is more idiomatic. |
“…charming on cigarette box…” | “…charming on cigarette …” | “sentences” is not the right word; “packages” is more accurate. |
“…as a person see this advertisement on the box…” | “…when a person sees this advertisement on the package…” | “see” should be “sees” for subject-verb agreement. |
“…will feel himself on his dreams…” | “…will feel connected to his dreams…” | “feel himself on his dreams” is awkward; “connected to” is clearer. |
“…the advertisement makers, regardless to the bad effects…” | “…the advertisement creators, regardless of the negative effects…” | “makers” is less formal; “negative effects” is more precise. |
“…i suggest authorities make some plans for the circumstance…” | “…I suggest that authorities implement regulations to address this issue…” | “i” should be capitalized; “implement regulations” is more formal and clear. |
“…to check and control advertisements before showing up.” | “…to monitor and control advertisements before they are aired.” | “showing up” is informal; “aired” is more appropriate in this context. |
New Word | Word Type | Definition |
---|---|---|
Manipulation | Noun | The act of influencing someone unfairly. |
Exploitation | Noun | Taking advantage of a situation or person. |
Deceptive | Adjective | Misleading or dishonest. |
Vulnerability | Noun | The quality of being open to harm. |
Regulation | Noun | A rule or directive made and maintained by an authority. |
Psychological | Adjective | Related to the mental and emotional state. |
Consumerism | Noun | The preoccupation with buying goods. |
Advertising Ethics | Noun | Moral principles that govern the advertising industry. |
Manipulative | Adjective | Characterized by unfairly influencing others. |
Target Audience | Noun | A particular group of consumers aimed at in advertising. |
Grammar Structure | Original Sentence | Rephrased Sentence |
---|---|---|
: has/have + past participle | “In what methods they are produced…” | “In what methods have they been produced…” |
: be + past participle | “the advertisement makers…will made them…” | “the advertisements…are often created…” |
: subordinate clause | “As a result his poor father will be finally obliged to buy the toy.” | “As a result, his father may ultimately feel compelled to purchase the toy.” |
: If + present simple, will + verb | “they will have high demand while they are watching…” | “If they see the advertisements, they will develop a high demand…” |
: verb + -ing | “by using a charming sentences on cigarette box…” | “by using charming phrases on cigarette packages…” |
: who/that/which | “by displaying a young lady with fitness body who is using some stuff…” | “by displaying a young lady with a fit body who uses a product…” |
Original Text | Improved Text | Explanation |
---|---|---|
“…In first point of view,…” | “…From one perspective,…” | “From one perspective” is clearer and more formal. |
“…but as home wife see the advertisement will feel that…” | “…however, a homemaker who sees the advertisement may feel that…” | “however” is a better transition word than “but.” |
“…In second point, they may use psychological weaknesses…” | “…Additionally, advertisers may exploit psychological weaknesses…” | “Additionally” improves the flow between points. |
“…by displaying a young lady…” | “…for instance, by displaying an attractive young woman…” | “For instance” provides a clearer example introduction. |
“…it may apparently not so bad…” | “…this may not seem harmful at first glance…” | “At first glance” is a more idiomatic expression. |
“…as a person see this advertisement on the box…” | “…when a person sees this advertisement on the package…” | “When” provides a clearer connection between cause and effect. |
“…but it may have bad consequences on society…” | “…but it may lead to negative consequences for society…” | “Lead to negative consequences” is more formal and precise. |
Here’s a sample correction (demo). To receive a sample response for your current writing, select the generate sample essay extension and click ‘Check Score’!
In today’s global society, advertisements are ubiquitous, appearing on television, in magazines, and on large LED boards at intersections. The methods employed in creating these advertisements often raise questions about their ethical implications. I contend that many advertisers prioritize viewer engagement and profit over ethical considerations, which can lead to negative consequences.
Firstly, some families may not need the products being advertised; however, a housewife might see an advertisement and feel compelled to purchase an item that she perceives as beneficial. Additionally, families with young children often face challenges due to their offspring’s limited understanding of family dynamics. Children exposed to advertisements for the latest toys may develop intense desires, leading to persistent requests and emotional outbursts. Consequently, parents may feel pressured to acquiesce and buy the toy, regardless of their initial intentions.
Secondly, advertisers frequently exploit psychological vulnerabilities. For instance, showcasing a fit young woman using a product may entice viewers to believe that purchasing the item will enhance their own appearance. While this tactic may seem innocuous at first glance, a deeper examination reveals its potential to distort the perceptions of young people, adversely affecting their self-esteem. Similarly, using alluring phrases on cigarette packaging, such as “the ideal of manhood,” can mislead individuals into associating smoking with aspirational qualities, driving them to make unhealthy choices.
In conclusion, advertisement creators often overlook the adverse effects their campaigns may have on society, focusing instead on customer satisfaction and profit maximization. To mitigate these issues, I recommend that authorities implement regulations to scrutinize and control advertisements before they are broadcasted. This approach could help ensure that advertising practices align more closely with ethical standards, ultimately benefiting society as a whole.
(Band 8.5 – 9.0)
In contemporary society, advertisements play a pervasive role, infiltrating our lives through television, print media, and digital platforms. The ethicality of the methods used in advertising has sparked significant debate, with many arguing that they are often unethical and unacceptable. I largely agree with this viewpoint, as many advertising strategies prioritize profit over the well-being of consumers.
To begin with, advertisements frequently manipulate consumers’ emotions and desires. For instance, families may not require certain products; however, an advertisement can create a sense of need. A housewife, upon seeing a compelling advertisement, might impulsively decide to purchase an item, believing it will enhance her family’s quality of life. Furthermore, children are particularly susceptible to advertising. When exposed to advertisements for trendy toys, they may develop a strong desire for these items, leading to persistent pleas to their parents, who may ultimately feel obligated to satisfy their child’s demands.
Moreover, many advertisements exploit psychological weaknesses. For example, portraying an idealized image of a fit individual using a product can create unrealistic expectations for viewers. This not only misrepresents the product’s efficacy but also contributes to a distorted self-image among young people. Additionally, the use of enticing slogans on products like cigarettes—such as “the essence of masculinity”—can mislead consumers into associating smoking with positive attributes, which can have detrimental health effects.
In summary, the advertising industry often prioritizes financial gain over ethical considerations, leading to negative consequences for society. To address these concerns, I advocate for stricter regulations that monitor and control advertising content, ensuring that it adheres to ethical standards. Such measures would promote a healthier relationship between consumers and the products being marketed, ultimately fostering a more responsible advertising landscape.
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Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Technological advancement and accessibility have rocketed over the past few years. Nowadays, the time utilization by children over smartphones is a soaring trend in commonplace. From my point of view, this is a pessimistic development, becoming a root cause of enormous problems.
Spending substantial hours over smartphones leads to unfavorable consequences for the children’s health holistically. To begin with, sitting and utilizing eyes for prolonged hours is outrageous for children’s eyesight and leads to eye complications like color blindness and contagious conjunctivitis. Also, other health issues, for instance, migraine, nervous system disruption, feeble memory, and backache are the evident significant effects of this cause. For example, recently a study exhibited by medical professionals depicted the inclining rate of 40% for children getting affected by such health issues.
Furthermore, misuse of time causes productivity descent in children to accomplish everyday critical tasks. Consistent laziness is another considerable emerging factor from this issue. The plunge in being active, attentive, and productive not only disrupts their studies and time but also affects their mood obnoxiously, leading to peak levels of frustration and anger in the long run. Another drawback noteworthy to mention is employing excessive hours on the phones causes phone game addiction. Consequently, unhealthy upliftment in screen time leads to their disconnectivity with real life, their families/parents. The pretending characters in games become their part of life, and such unpleasant inculcation of themselves in games ultimately isolates them from the inside and others. For instance, a heartbreaking news two years back in India revealed an eight-year-old boy killed his mother for being interrupted by her in playing PUBG game.
In conclusion, the surge in phone usage by children in recent times has resulted in atrocious health, behavioral, and lifestyle problems, because of which isolation and detachment are the certain witnessing examples.
Whenever you switch on your television, you only get to listen about either human’s health or variants of diseases spread all over the world. It is argued that in the future generation there is going to be a standard decrease in people’s health than the present period. Whereas I completely agree with this statement and will be discussing the reasons in the forthcoming paragraphs.
I strongly believe, the decline of life expectancy rate is due to non-nutritious food intake and imbalanced lifestyle. Mainly, in recent years people only prefer to eat outside food rather than home cooked food. In contrast, humans can become easily obese or, because of excessive of oil usage they get cardiac disease in early age. For instance, my cousin younger brother got thyroid in his teenage due to overeating greasy food and high consumption of “Ajinomoto” in his diet.
Additionally, young generations prefer living easy over a tougher lifestyle. They prefer sitting in one place, not doing even their own house chores. Moreover, they have a pretty bad sleep cycle because of their late-night activities such as gaming or consuming food at untimed intervals. Furthermore, not working out regularly or not having a proper sleep. This causes them to lead an unhealthy lifestyle and results in a decrease of life span. I am an example of this myself. A year ago, I was not doing any physical activity and was only playing games all day long. Due to that, I got insomnia, which I suffered a lot to recover from that period.
In conclusion, people having inappropriate lifestyle and intaking unhealthy food can decrease the life span of people in upcoming days. But proper meals and a consistent workout can create a significant impact on people’s health.
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Updated On Aug 05, 2024
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