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I’m a teacher — and my dog ate my students’ homework.

Would you look at that: The dog really did eat their homework.

A teacher was left shocked after her pet pooch devoured her class’ assignments, leaving paper fragments all over her kitchen floor.

The photo went viral in a Reddit thread with the caption, “When you’re a teacher and your dog eats everyone’s homework.”

The post earned more than 1,100 upvotes and people on the platform were quick to crack a few jokes about the puppy mishap.

“How the tables turn,” one user said.

“You should show this picture to your class. They’d enjoy it (as long as you give everyone good marks for it),” commented someone else.

“But the real question is … do the kids believe you or do they think you’re making an excuse because you forgot to grade their homework?” quipped another.

While it’s unclear whether the Reddit poster, who did not reveal specifics, really is a teacher or not, it didn’t stop readers’ imaginations.

“I would have LOVE for a teacher to come in and say, ‘Kids. You all got As. My dog ate your homework,'” one user giggled, while another said: “Good dog! Now everyone gets an ‘A.'”

“Your dog: ‘See? I got rid of all this so you have more time to pet me!'” joked someone else.

Although the age-old excuse is usually just a fib, hungry hounds have been known to actually eat kids’ homework. In fact, just two years ago, a student in the Philippines fell victim to his dogs’ late-night munchies — all of which was caught on video.

The two pups played a round of tug of war with the papers until it was in scraps, making a confusing sight for the student, Darren James Lamban, when he awoke the next morning.

While he might be one of the only people whose devious pet has truly snacked on their homework, the excuse dates back to the beginning of the 20th century.

In a 1905 edition of a Welsh-American magazine, music critic William ApMadoc recited an old anecdote of a minister whose sermon met the same distasteful fate — being eaten by his dog.

But it wasn’t until a 1929 speech penned by a retiring headmaster, James Bewsher, that the tale of homework-eating pups was seen.

“It is a long time since I have had the excuse about the dog tearing up the arithmetic homework,” his speech, which was published in the Manchester Guardian, read.

Other sources claim John Steinbeck once begged an editor to extend the deadline for “Of Mice and Men” in 1936 due to the manuscript’s unfortunate bout with the author’s Irish setter, who took a hefty bite — or two — out of the book.

Or so he said.

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My Dog Ate My Homework: How to Correct Unwanted Dog Behavior

Sometime throughout your life you may have heard (or possibly used) the old expression, “the dog ate my homework.” Hopefully, you haven’t had to actually deal with your four-legged friend using your work assignment as a midday snack. If they are exhibiting unwanted behavior like chewing on things that aren’t theirs, we can help.

Dogs, especially puppies, are delicate animals that need to feel loved, safe, and secure within our homes. When our furry friends do something we don’t like, the last thing we want to do is try to correct the behavior in a way that makes them feel confused or scared. Luckily, there are plenty of positive ways to address and correct your dog’s behavior that won’t cause unnecessary stress for you or your pooch.

Identifying Bad Behavior

Before you can correct your dog’s bad habits, you need to be able to identify what is and is not bad behavior. Though some “bad” behaviors are common characteristics of all dogs, the problem arises when the action becomes excessive, damaging, or unwelcome.

Common bad habits that may need to be addressed include:

• Excessive barking
• Biting and/or nipping

It is important to remember that a lot of factors can impact a dog’s behavior. Their breed, age, medical history, and past experiences all shape how they act and how they may respond to training. There are also many different reasons why your dog may act out that range from separation anxiety to sheer boredom .

Is your dog acting out because they are seeking attention? Or maybe they are just unfamiliar with a new situation and that makes them anxious. It is helpful to identify potential causes of behavior problems to help better understand what training they may need.

No matter the reason for the misdeeds, it’s important to stop undesirable behavior before it becomes part of your dog’s normal routine. Luckily, there are a few methods you can use to address and correct bad behavior that when executed properly, can help most dogs curb their harmful habits.

Preventing Bad Behavior

Once you have identified your dog’s bad behavior, you can begin to formulate a plan to address and correct the troublesome trait. The most important factor to remember is that punishment is not the answer. Instead, use positive reward-based correction and training to teach your dog that good things happen when they do what you ask.

Corrections Instead of Punishments

Corrections are used to help your pup learn right from wrong. The purpose of a correction is to demonstrate a fact to your dog, while gaining the ability to understand, and reduce, unwanted behaviors. We all make mistakes, but it’s important to teach our dogs to avoid the behaviors we don’t want, and to encourage them with the behaviors we do want. This makes for a happy home for both pup and pup parent.

Several behavioral corrections can be used to train your pooch the right and safe way. Two of the more popular correction methods are withholding a reward and reprimanding.

Withholding a Reward

During your training sessions, try giving your dog commands and reward them with some delicious Bil-Jac Little Jacs Training Treats  for the right behavior and withhold the treat if they do any unwanted dog behavior.

By repeating this exercise several times with your pooch, they will start to understand that they are only rewarded for doing the thing you want them to do. This form of training will help your dog create a positive association with good behaviors, which is much more effective than punishing a dog for bad behavior.

In contrast, withholding a reward when he or she doesn’t follow direction will teach your furry friend to avoid that behavior in the future. For some pups, withholding a reward is all they need to correct their bad dog behavior.

Reprimanding the Puppy

When withholding a reward isn’t enough, sometimes it makes sense to reprimand your puppy. This may sound intimidating, but reprimanding your puppy is not about scaring them or hurting your four-legged friend. Instead, it is simply creating a learning moment your dog can recognize as out of the norm to help signal something is not right.

Giving a simple but firm ‘NO!’ with a finger point or a brief leash tug is enough to alert your pup that they need to make an adjustment. By doing this, and withholding a reward, your dog should learn to adjust their behavior fairly quickly.

Redirection

Another way to correct unwanted dog behavior is through redirection. A lot of behavior that we as pet parents deem as “bad” is oftentimes just instinctive habits our pup can’t fully turn off. Chewing, barking, and digging are all habits that come naturally to our dogs, so it may be impossible to fully stop these behaviors. What we can do, however, is redirect our dog’s attention to less damaging activities when these “bad” behaviors occur.

If your dog is chewing, digging, jumping, or exhibiting a behavior you don’t like, offer them their favorite chew toy, play a few rounds of tug, or take them for a jog around the block. Sometimes even some basic exercise can help burn off steam and distract them from their initial bad actions.

S ocialization

When it comes to correcting unwanted dog behavior, socialization goes a long way.

Sometimes our furry friends act up because they are anxious, confused, or scared. When you regularly socialize your pup , they become more accustomed to different sounds, smells, and new sensations. These new experiences help your dog learn how to relax in unfamiliar situations, and in turn they are less likely to overreact or exhibit bad behavior like barking, jumping, biting, and chasing when caught off guard.

Work With a Trainer

Sometimes it can be hard to figure out what our dog’s need. Luckily, dog trainers are a great resource to lean on when we aren’t sure how to help our furry friends. Professional Animal Trainer and TV Show Host Joel Silverman is a phenomenal source of information when it comes to raising, training , and caring for dogs of all ages. When asked about curbing bad behavior, Silverman offers some helpful advice to keep in mind:

“If you can catch a dog right when he’s starting to dig or chew and say, ‘knock it off,’ now you’re sending a message the dog can understand,” Silverman explains. “A verbal correction combined with preventative training, which is not giving the dog the opportunity to be in that situation, is how you get rid of those problems.”

Ultimately, the most important thing to do when you want to correct unwanted dog behavior is to remember that practice makes perfect. Dogs are smart and social animals and want to please their dog parents, so regularly reinforcing good behavior will help them stay consistent. Plus, training your pup and using corrections is a great way to build your bond and ensure a healthy and happy home for the whole family.

Want to learn more about what you can do to keep your furry friend happy, healthy, and well-behaved? Join our Best Friends Club today to receive our exclusive email newsletter full of informative articles, training tips, and members-only discounts on Bil-Jac dog food, treats, and other products.

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What To Do When Your Dog Eats Your Homework (Literally)

Tanner Dritschler @ Apr 04, 2024

You've just brewed a warm cup of coffee, you're sitting down to finally tackle that mountain of   homework , and then—chomp, chomp, chomp—your furry best friend decides your essay looks like a tasty treat. Yep, that age-old excuse "my dog ate my homework" isn't so funny when it becomes your reality! But before you start worrying about Fido's literary critique of your work, let's consider the real chew toy at hand—our dogs' safety when they nibble on our notes.

Understanding the Why

Why do dogs chew on paper? It's not like they're trying to give us their two cents on our thesis statements. The truth is, our canine companions might chew on paper out of sheer boredom or because they're on a secret mission to uncover the "taste" of knowledge. It could also be a sign of behavioral issues, such as separation anxiety or a lack of mental stimulation. Think of it as your dog's way of saying, "This essay could use a little more flavor."

However, it's not all about them being undercover book critics. Sometimes, our dogs just love the texture or the attention they get from us when they're caught in the act. It's like they're saying, "Look, I'm helping you edit!" But before we start praising our pups for their editorial insights, let's make sure we're addressing any underlying issues that could be leading to this paper feast.

Health First - Assessing the Situation

If your dog just had a field day with your   homework , the first step is to keep calm and check on your pup. While most paper products are non-toxic, they can still cause a blockage or upset tummy. Keep an eye on your dog for any signs of distress, like pawing at the mouth, gagging, or a sudden game of hide-and-seek under the bed. Remember, while dogs are great at many things, digesting complex carbohydrates—and complex calculus problems—is not one of them.

After you've ensured your dog isn't in any immediate danger, it's time to think about the next steps. Will there be any repercussions from this unexpected snack? Do you need to call in the homework cavalry? Don't worry, we've got your back (and your dog's belly) covered with some tail-wagging advice.

To Vet or Not to Vet

Now, deciding whether to rush to the vet can be as tricky as a dog trying to understand quantum physics. If your dog is acting like their usual, tail-wagging self, you might just need to monitor them closely. However, if you notice any unusual behavior or symptoms, like vomiting, lethargy, or a sudden disinterest in their favorite squeaky toy, it's probably time to call in the professionals (better safe than sorry) . Remember, while we wish we could add our pups to our student health plans, their care is a bit more specialized.

It's always better to err on the side of caution, so if you're in doubt, give your vet a shout. They can provide the best advice for your dog's breed, size, and the amount of   homework   they've turned into an appetizer. It's like having a homework hotline, but for your dog's health!

Preventative Measures

Preventing future paper feasts starts with understanding that your dog doesn't share your appreciation for literature. Keep your homework and other important papers out of paw's reach—think high shelves or closed rooms. After all, dogs are great jumpers, but they haven't mastered doorknobs... yet. And let's be honest, they'd probably prefer a good chew toy over your book report any day. Maybe we should start designing chew toys shaped like diplomas?

Training is key, too. Teach your furry friend the "leave it" command, and make sure they have plenty of appropriate chew toys to keep them occupied. It's like swapping out their snack of paper for a healthier option, like a rubber bone or a puzzle feeder. Who knows, maybe they'll develop a taste for toys that look like A+ report cards instead of your actual A+ report card.

Turning Lemons into Lemonade

When life gives you chewed-up homework, make... art? That's right, why not turn this little mishap into a masterpiece by commissioning a custom pet portrait?   West & Willow   can transform the remnants of your homework into a beautiful tribute to your dog's... creativity. It's a way to embrace the humor in the situation and share a good laugh with your fellow dog-loving friends. Plus, who wouldn't want to start a new trend of "homework art" curated by our pups?

Imagine hanging a framed portrait of your dog alongside the scraps of your algebra assignment—now that's a conversation starter! It's a way to celebrate the love and laughter that comes with having a canine companion, even when they turn your important documents into confetti. So, let's raise a paw to our furry friends and their unexpected contributions to our décor!

Homework Recovery

So, your dog has eaten your   homework —now what? First, take a deep breath and consider the digital age we live in. Most schools and universities are pretty understanding about canine-induced catastrophes, especially if you can provide a backup of your work. Cloud storage, USB drives, and email drafts are your new best friends. And for the future? It might be time to invest in a "dog-proof" homework folder, made from the toughest materials known to canine kind—or at least tougher than your standard notebook paper.

When it comes to explaining the situation to your teacher or professor, honesty is the best policy. Share the tale of your dog's dietary indiscretion (hopefully with photo/video proof), and you might just find they have a soft spot for pet-related predicaments. After all, who can resist a good dog story? Just make sure you have a plan in place to prevent a repeat performance. Your dog may be an adorable excuse for missing homework, but let's not make it a habit!

If you've ever uttered the words "my dog ate my   homework " and meant it, you're not alone. It's a rite of passage for hardcore dog owners, a story that joins us in the great tapestry of pet parenting. These moments remind us that life with our four-legged friends is filled with joy, laughter, and the occasional chewed-up essay. But hey, that's what makes it an adventure, right?

As we wrap up this guide, remember that every day with your dog is a learning experience—for both of you. So, let's take these lessons in stride, keep our homework out of reach, and maybe frame a picture of our mischievous mutts as a reminder of the day they tried to digest Shakespeare. Because at the end of the day, our dogs may not be the best study buddies, but they're certainly the best companions.

What should I do immediately if my dog eats my homework?

Check your dog for any signs of distress and remove any remaining paper from reach. Keep an eye on them for the next few hours for any unusual behavior, and consider calling your vet if you're concerned.

How can I tell if my dog is actually sick from eating paper?

Watch for symptoms like vomiting, diarrhea, lack of appetite, or lethargy. These could indicate that the paper has caused a blockage or other digestive issues.

Are there any long-term effects of my dog eating paper?

Occasional paper eating may not cause long-term issues, but repeated incidents can lead to digestive problems. Consult your vet if this becomes a habit.

How can I train my dog to stop chewing on paper?

Teach the "leave it" command, provide plenty of appropriate chew toys, and keep papers out of reach. Consistent training and mental stimulation can help curb the behavior.

Can I still get a custom pet portrait if my dog has eaten part of the photo I wanted to use?

Absolutely! West & Willow can work with various photo qualities, or you can choose a different image if the original is too damaged. Your dog's portrait will still look paw-some!

Jen L. - Marketing Manager

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Where Did The Phrase “The Dog Ate My Homework” Come From?

Dogs are known as man’s best friend. Dogs keep us safe, are hard workers … and can provide a handy excuse in a pinch. Maybe that’s why versions of the classic expression the dog ate my homework have been around for hundreds of years.

Today, the dog ate my homework is used as a stock example of the kind of silly excuses schoolchildren give for why their work isn’t finished. Very rarely do people say, “the dog ate my homework” and expect it to be taken literally; they use the expression as an example of a typically flimsy excuse.

So where did the phrase come from?

Forrest Wickman, a writer for Slate , describes the legend of the 6th-century Saint Ciarán of Clonmacnoise as the alleged first recorded “the dog ate my homework” story. According to the tale, Saint Ciarán had a tame young fox that would take his writings to his master for him. One day, the fox grew up and decided to eat the leather strap binding the writings together instead. Still, this tale is more Garden-of-Eden parable and less terrible schoolchild excuse.

The notion that dogs will eat just about anything, including paper, turns up in lots of stories over the centuries. An example comes from The Humors of Whist , published in 1808 in Sporting Magazine . In the story, the players are sitting around playing cards when one of them remarks that their companion would have lost the game had the dog not eaten the losing card. Good boy.

Some attribute the creation of the dog ate my homework to a joke that was going around at the beginning of the 20th century. In a tale found as far back as an 1894 memoir by Anglican priest Samuel Reynolds Hole, a preacher gives a shortened version of a sermon because a dog got into his study and ate some of the pages he had written. However, the clerk loved it because they had been wanting the preacher to shorten his sermons for years.

According to the Oxford English Dictionary , the first example of the dog ate my homework excuse in print can be found in a speech given by retiring headmaster James Bewsher in 1929 and published in the Manchester Guardian : “It is a long time since I have had the excuse about the dog tearing up the arithmetic homework.” The way this comment is phrased suggests that the whole dog ate my homework story had been around for some time before it was put in print.

When was the word homework created?

But in order for a dog to eat homework specifically, homework had to be invented (oh, and how we wish it hadn’t been). True, the word homework , as in what we call today housework , appears as early as 1653. But homework , as in school exercises to be done at home, isn’t found until 1852. Once we had homework , it was only a matter of time before the dog was accused of eating it.

How we use this phrase now

No matter the origin, sometime in the 1950s, the expression became set as the dog ate my homework . This inspired any number of riffs on the theme, like my cow ate my homework or my brother ate my homework . In the 1960s, the dog ate my homework continued to gain popularity. The expression popped up a couple times in politics over the years, like when President Reagan said to reporters in 1988, “I had hoped that we had marked the end of the ‘dog-ate-my-homework’ era of Congressional budgetry … but it was not to be.”

It seems unlikely that the dog ate my homework was ever used consistently or frequently by actual schoolchildren. In fact, it’s the unlikeliness of the story that makes it so funny and absurd as a joke. Instead, teachers and authority figures appear to have cited the dog ate my homework many times over the years as such a bad excuse they can’t believe students are really using it.

In the 21st century, students don’t spend as much time working with physical pen and paper as they once did. That may contribute to the decline in the use of the phrase. So, maybe soon we’ll see a new equally absurd phrase pop up. Come on Zoomers, you’ve got this.

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Origin of "my dog ate my homework"?

Is there a specifc incident or origin story for the common joke/comedic phrase "my dog ate my homework"? I always wondered whether there was a student who became notorious for not turning in their homework and using that excuse, or whether someone somewhere used it as a flimsy excuse and everyone thought it was funny, or any other reason...

If no one can find anything, do we at least know how long it's been around as a saying?

Also, how often does it turn out to be true? Has anyone here who owned a dog during childhood ever actually had that happen to them?

• 2 Yes, one of our dogs chews lots of things if they are left lying about. It is completely plausible. I’d bet it originated in truth about the same time as people started letting dogs live inside the home and homework was being done on paper. –  Jim Commented Mar 6, 2019 at 2:03
• Here is a piece that recounts a similar joke as early as 1905: slate.com/human-interest/2012/10/… . However, I do not have any evidence that this was the earliest occurrence. –  Benjamin Kuykendall Commented Mar 6, 2019 at 2:04
• It's been around for as long as there have been dogs and homework. –  Hot Licks Commented Mar 6, 2019 at 2:05
• That article would make a pretty good answer. –  DJClayworth Commented Mar 6, 2019 at 4:13

The phrase was actually built up through a series of sentences like, ' My dog chewed it up ' and ' My cat chewed it up and I had no time to do it over. '

These sentences were first used in the 1965 comic novel, Up the Down Staircase.

But it mainly became popular in 1974 when a book was written with the title, ' The Cat Ate My Gym. ' Many works had the same reference and only then did it become a classic punch.

It's funny, anyway.

• 2 1965 may be the origin of the two precise sentences you quote, but it is definitely not the origin of the trope, which is attested in written sources from the beginning of the 20th century. –  Janus Bahs Jacquet Commented Mar 6, 2019 at 16:15

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BUT THE DOG REALLY DID

EAT MY HOMEWORK!

There's a kid, name of Kyle, homework's not quite his style,

likes to get a drink and sit there for awhile, (This is Kyle!)

puts his work in a pile, (he prefers to smile)

starts in just a little while. Kyle really did do his

homework and he put it in his pack on the floor. Uh oh!

"Did you know that a dog would eat homework?"

When he got up he said, "Oh my gosh, now I'm dead!"

There was chewed-up homework lying on the floor by his bed.

"Come here, dog!" Kyle said. Doggy tilts his head.

"What's your problem, dog? You were already fed.

You've got bones in your head!" Kyle said,

ran off and got the bus, saw his friends and said:

"Do you know that my dog ate my homework?"

All his friends said, "Yeah right! Like you're up half the night,

doing homework now or some-thing." "Guess again. Not too bright!"

"Say that you hurt your hand, and you couldn't write."

"Say your folks were out last night. Go bump your head."

"See the nurse. Act sick.”

“Just spin and spin until you fall down." they said.

"But my dog really did eat my homework."

Later on in his class, Teacher said, "Will you pass

in your homework please from yesterday." Then Kyle said, "Alas!"

When he tried to explain  it was all in vain,

and the teacher shook her head "Kyle, let and said to

Kyle, "Let me make something plain:

At three o'clock you will re main. See you after class!"

"But the dog really did eat my homework!"

So until 3:45 he stayed,

till his debt to society was paid, I'm afraid,

When he got home, he said to the dog on his bed,

"It was you got me in trouble after school, Dodo head!

All the world now thinks that I'm a big disgrace,

and they're on my case!

Why did you have to go eat my homework?"

...Then the dog licked his face.

This song is a true story. Kyle Ng’s

dog “Keiko”, a 7 month- old Boxer-

German shepherd mix, really did

eat his homework. But nobody

believed him, including his music

teacher, the composer of this song.

Kyle says that his dog is smart and

obeys commands such as “Eat!”.

words & music by Bill Vollinger ©2004

Heritage Choral 15/2005H

“But the Dog REALLY

DID Eat My Homework!”

(two-part treble voices & piano)

The Lorenz Corporation

501 E. Third St.

Dayton, Ohio 45401

(800) 444-1144 ext. 1

click for ordering information

April 18, 2014

Contemporary Fiction , Education

The Dog Ate My Homework

It seemed like the most plausible excuse at the time: blame the new dog for eating up my now overdue essay. But then I just had to embellish...

Karen Donley-Hayes

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The fact of the matter was, I didn’t have anyone else to blame. So I blamed Roscoe–perhaps ill-advised, him being my father’s K-9 partner-in-waiting, but I had completely forgotten my homework. I wasn’t in the habit of lying or putting blame where it didn’t belong, but I was caught off guard–daydreaming about Roscoe, in fact. My third grade teacher now loomed over my desk, expectant, her hand outstretched, fingers wiggling. And in my deer-in-the-headlights stare, with Miss Underwood frowning down at me, the words blurted out all on their own.

“Roscoe ate it.”

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“What?” Miss Underwood scowled more, if that were possible. She planted her fists against her ample hips and leaned in, hovering over me.

I blinked, swallowed a spitless lump in my throat, and having already lied, promptly repeated myself. “Roscoe ate it,” I said with slightly more conviction.

Miss Underwood stood stiff, smack dab in front of my desk, so close I should have been able to smell the little flowers on her dress. I had an overpowering impulse to move away from her, but my chair shackled me to the spot. I stared at the vibrant gladiola sprouting out from beneath Miss Underwood’s belt, and felt the entire class’s attention span shake from all else and swoop down on me.

“Mister Pike. You are not lying to me, are you?” It was more a challenge than a question.

Miss Underwood absolutely terrified me–almost as much as did the prospect of acquiring the entire class’s ridicule or getting caught in a bald-faced lie–and such terror can be a remarkable survival mechanism, because my brain spun a web and my mouth spewed it out without so much as consulting with me. I sat, breathless and rapt with the rest of the class, listening to this story unfold.

“Oh, no ma’am,” a voice–my voice–poured out of me, my brain, frenetic, only barely keeping a syllable ahead of my mouth. “I wrote my report on the metamorphosis of tadpoles into frogs,” I heard. (It was a good thing I had recently become fascinated by this amphibious process and had not only been reading about it but observing it in the natural setting of our backyard.) “And I took the paper with me to the pond so that I could look at them and draw pictures to show the stages, and Roscoe came with me, and I had a tadpole on the top of the paper so I could trace it and Roscoe saw it and before I knew what happened he jumped on it and swallowed it whole, and the paper.”

I shifted my bug-eyed gaze up the floral landscape to the teacher’s face. Miss Underwood remained completely still.

“And the rock that I had holding the paper down,” my voice said. Her eye twitched, barely perceptible. “And the pencil I was using.” Her brows drew closer together. “And then it was dark, and I couldn’t draw them again, and then I had to do my chores and it was time for bed.”

Miss Underwood frowned, unwedged one hand from her hip and pointed at my chest. “You’d better be sure to get that dog to the vet, young man.”

“Yes, ma’am.” I nodded vigorously. “We’re taking him this afternoon.”

“Good,” she said. “And re-write your report and bring it in tomorrow. Along with a report on how Roscoe did at the vet’s.”

“Yes, ma’am,” I said, and wondered if the pittance I had in the Mason jar under my bed could buy me a plane, train, or boat ticket anywhere else in the world.

That afternoon, when I slouched from the school bus, Roscoe careened down the driveway to meet me, his half-grown legs all knobs and paws flying indiscriminately; he seemed none the worse for wear for his “misadventure” of the day before. I trudged up the driveway, the pup orbiting around me, bounding and panting, pausing only to wolf down my mother’s lone remaining gladiola. While my reporting of late had been very light on honesty, there was truth to the fact that Roscoe was a one-canine mauling, gulping, devouring, completely-nondiscriminatory eating machine. The gladiolas, much to my mother’s dismay, had vanished into his maw during a single galumphing frenzy; this was shortly after Roscoe had discovered the infinite wonders that the frog pond in the backyard held. Mom had admonished my father to restrain the dog. Dad had testified that socialization was critical to Roscoe’s mental development and future as a police dog. Mom declared her flowers unfair casualties. Dad promised to build a fence for her gardens (a moot point, as Roscoe had already decimated them).

The sound of my mother’s footsteps on the porch drew my attention; I looked up to see Roscoe gleefully caprioling by her side. She had her arms crossed over her chest, and was staring at me with an expression that immediately made me slow my already lethargic trudge.

“I hear Roscoe ate your homework,” she said. There was no tone of accusation or belief–or even disbelief, for that matter–just a simple statement. I stopped and looked up at her, and for two ticks of a heartbeat I was on the verge of coming clean. I steeled myself to admit my lie, to face the consequences, and to be a better man for it. During those two ticks of a heartbeat, Roscoe splayed himself on the porch and latched onto one of the banister posts, gnawing and grunting.

“Yes ma’am,” I said, and felt the heat rise under my collar as I lied to my own mother. I looked intently at Roscoe (who supported my story with his every action) to avoid looking in my mother’s eyes. I heard her sigh.

“Well, alright then. I called Dr. Brown’s office as soon as Miss Underwood phoned me, so let’s get things together and get going. Hopefully, he’ll be fine; it’s that rock I’m worried about.”

I nodded and walked up the porch steps, head down and ashamed, and slipped past my mother, past the squirming, euphoric mass of German shepherd enthusiasm. My mother stayed on the porch while I dropped my book bag on the kitchen table. Roscoe leapt up, flung himself against her legs. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her reach down idly and rub his head. He gazed up at her adoringly, his tongue lolling out of his mouth, wood splinters flecking his lips; his tailed swished nonstop across the porch.

“Maybe the paper and rock and all just went right through him,” I said, and hoped that if a dog actually were to eat a paper and a rock, they might actually move right along. Otherwise, I was going to be busted when the vet checked the dog out and declared him devoid of foreign objects. Not that I wanted him to have a problem; I didn’t, but his clean bill of health was my sentence. Granted, it was of my own making.

“I hope so,” Mom’s voice came in from the porch. I heard her add, under her breath, “Roscoe, you’re going to be the death of me if you live long enough.”

In the vet’s waiting room, I studiously worked on my tadpole-to-frog report, shielding it from Roscoe, who my mother worked up a sweat restraining. And when it was finally his turn to go in and be examined, and I was left with silence and the weight of my own guilt, I could barely remember the details of amphibian metamorphosis, much less write about them. Mom, quiet, read a paperback. The clock on the wall ticked off five minutes, 10, 15; the smell of the waiting room mixed with the odor of wet dog, cat pee, and rodent cage litter, and I began to feel nauseous.

“How’s your paper coming?” Mom asked. I shrugged. I sweated.

I was nearly to the point of breaking down and admitting my guilt, or at least bolting from the waiting room and into the parking lot, when Dr. Brown summoned us. Mom clutched her purse, and I drooped behind her, a condemned man going to the gallows. The vet brought us into the execution chamber, and closed the door. The harsh florescent lights gleamed, ruthless and all-seeing. Roscoe was not in the room to witness my punishment.

Dr. Brown cleared his throat. I felt a prickling thrill of sweat, and stared fixedly at the poster of canine parasites on the wall. “Well, we took x-rays of Roscoe, and we don’t see your rock or your paper.”

I couldn’t help a fleeting glance at the vet; he met my eyes for a beat, then looked over at Mom. “But it’s a good thing you brought him in, because we did see something else.”

I blinked, confused.

“Oh?” my mother said.

Dr. Brown turned his back to us, popped a thick sheet of film against a panel, and turned on the light behind it. Ribs and spine and gray masses flickered to light. Dr. Brown glanced over his shoulder toward us. Both Mom and I leaned toward the glowing image. Dr. Brown cleared his throat again and pointed to something in the middle of the picture. I looked closer, squinted, and then with a sting of recognition, I understood the image on the screen. My mother realized at the same time, and she chuffed, glancing sidelong at me.

“This,” Dr. Brown said, tapping the image of my G.I. Joe, recently MIA, “needs to come out. And it won’t come out the easy way like that rock did,” he glanced down at me again. “It will snag other things he swallows, and you’re going to have a bad emergency situation, maybe a dead dog.”

My mother reached for the collar of her blouse, pressed her hand flat. “Oh, no. Oh, poor Roscoe!”

My skin prickled again, but I wasn’t worried about my guilt and punishment anymore. “Will he be okay?” My voice sounded tiny and tremulous. “He won’t really die, will he?”

Dr. Brown smiled then. “No, I think we got him in time. We’ll put him on the surgery schedule for the morning, and he should be right as rain in a month’s time.” He reached a hand out and ruffled my hair. I realized I was crying. “In a way, it’s a good thing he ate your homework, otherwise you might not have found out about this until it was too late.”

I looked up at him lamely.

That weekend, Dad fenced off what was left of Mom’s gardens, I patrolled the entire house and yard and commandeered all swallowable objects (and even some that didn’t seem swallowable), and my folks and I discussed the new obedience regimen for Roscoe. When he came home a few days later, belly shaved but none-the-worse for wear, I doted on him and chaperoned him vigilantly. After a short period of gorging withdrawal, Roscoe adjusted gleefully to his obedience training, and was already ahead of the learning curve when he officially entered his police-dog training.

I was too ashamed to ever admit to my parents my panic-induced homework fabrication. I like to think that the guilt and anxiety I experienced for that long afternoon was punishment enough, and sometimes, I also like to think that it was all part of the plan for Roscoe’s long and decorated life. I like to think that, but I don’t believe it much more than Miss Underwood believed me.

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Why not "the dog has eaten my homework"?

Why do we say "The dog ate my homework" without the perfect present?

I know the perfect present is used to describe an action in the past that influences the present (an explicit call to action). So should it be "The dog has eaten my homework (so I cannot read them out loud)". No?

Having that said, most of the time we tell about the past in relation to the present. I mean it seems most actions in the past have an influence to the present when we mention them. I feel I overuse it.

• present-perfect

• 3 My guess is it's just that non-native Anglophones wouldn't be at all likely to use this extremely tongue-in-cheek excuse. And only a non-native speaker would think of using the more complicated verb form here, because only a non-native speaker would be thinking of that "rule" about using Present Perfect to reflect relevance to time of utterance. Native speakers (especially, the ones who don't do their homework! :) are much more likely to stick to Simple Past in a context like this. –  FumbleFingers Commented Mar 29, 2021 at 16:43
• 3 ... here , by the way, is "evidence" that OP is quite right - almost no-one ever says The dog has eaten my homework , even though the context is almost always one where the past action is extremely relevant to "time of utterance" (precisely because it's being given as an excuse). It's an interesting question though! :) –  FumbleFingers Commented Mar 29, 2021 at 16:45
• I just ask why was this rooted in past simple the first place. We are all used to say " where have i heard this before " or " where have you been " but why are we used to past simple here? –  Elad Benda Commented Mar 29, 2021 at 17:27
• There is much understanding regarding the fact that the present perfect is used to mean in the past without mentioning when or referring to a specific act. So, it all boils down to how you want to say it. Do you just want to signal the past at time of speaking ?? OR : Do you want to refer to a one-time event in the past ?? That is the difference between the two. And this question has been answered many, many times on this site. –  Lambie Commented Mar 29, 2021 at 17:40
• 1 I don't see why a sarcastic teacher might not say, e.g., 'the dog has been eating your homework a lot lately'. –  Michael Harvey Commented Mar 29, 2021 at 18:03

It is commonly taught that the present perfect tense in English means "happened in the past but relevant in the present", but I think this is not quite right, as shown by your question. The present perfect indicates to the listener that you are thinking of the event in relation to a certain time interval, which begins somewhere in the past and extends to the present and possibly beyond. The event happened somewhere in this time interval, possibly even just now, as in "Jones has won the race!" (spoken as Jones crosses the finish line). Exactly what time interval is understood depends heavily on context. For more information, see this answer .

The reason we don't say "The dog has eaten my homework" is because that would suggest that it still might be possible to do something about it. We say "The dog ate my homework" because that places the event clearly in the past, severed from the present, implying that it is over and nothing can be done about it.

"The dog has eaten my homework" suggests that something could still be done about it, because it leads the listener to view the event as part of a time interval or process that continues up to and possibly beyond the present moment. For another example of this, see the "Lost keys" section of this answer . The simple past does not evoke that time interval, so it's a clearer way to imply that the homework is irretrievably gone. If there were still several hours until the deadline, you might say to another student, "The dog has eaten my homework" to ask for help—perhaps there is still enough time to redo the homework or maybe even recover it from the dog (the sort of thing that might happen in a comedy).

Note that there is no rule here, beyond "the present perfect invites the listener to think of the event within a time interval that continues up to and possibly beyond the present". There is no rule that the present perfect implies that something could still be done to change the result, nor a rule that the simple past tense implies that nothing can be done to change the result. The implications of the time interval vary enormously from context to context, calling upon understanding of the topic, what's at stake, other conventional usage, etc.

You should know that linguists and schoolteachers commonly hold to the theory that the present perfect means "happened in the past but relevant in the present". So, if you point out a time interval on an exam, you will likely be marked wrong. And you should know that linguists and schoolteachers are often wrong. But I could be wrong, too, of course. Much of English grammar is still not well understood scientifically, and no authority is completely reliable. I think you are taking the right course: learning from real usage, one sentence at a time, thinking about it, and sometimes asking what other people think. That is how everyone has learned how to really speak any language.

• Past perfect= a thing happened in the past without specifying when at the time of speaking . The dog eating the homework is not the usage where the thing extends to the present. It is the usage where the action occurs at a non-specified time in the past at the time of speaking. –  Lambie Commented Mar 29, 2021 at 18:23
• What about "I have heard you" - it's completed and there is nothing to do about it. –  Elad Benda Commented Mar 29, 2021 at 19:25
• @Lambie so I'm confused. No specific time, but still past simple? "ate" –  Elad Benda Commented Mar 29, 2021 at 19:26
• @Etad Benda Yes, I ate it. [But I am not telling you when: this am, last night, last week]. Try to think about past perfect and the "time of speaking"; I suggest you look up my many posts on this subject.....:) –  Lambie Commented Mar 29, 2021 at 19:32
• @EladBenda See the paragraph that starts "Note that there is no rule here" (and the linked answers). We would need to know more context to understand why someone chose to say "I have heard you" instead of "I heard you." Something nice about the dog/homework example is that a pretty rich context is clearly implied. –  Ben Kovitz Commented Mar 29, 2021 at 20:20

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Is the “my dog ate my homework” really an excuse used in the US?

I live all the way in Asia, so the things I know about the west are learned from either cartoons or social media. Was wondering if this is actually an excuse used by children/teens to their teachers for homework.

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